Seven Secrets of Sensational Success

Before talking about the secret to sensational success or even outlining a formula, it’s important to define success and just what it means to you. Everyone has their own individual definition of success. But there’s absolutely no way we can talk about the secret to success without first creating some definition of what success actually means to us.

Success in life has nothing to do with where you start. Sure, people who start advantageously in one area or another might have a leg up, but it has almost nothing to do with where they end up in life. Sensational success transcends circumstances.

Many people talk about success. They say they want to be successful at something. But, when prodded, they don’t provide specifics because they haven’t really created those specifics in their minds. Sure, they might want to earn more money, drive a nicer car, get a better job, or travel to some far-off destination, but they haven’t set specific and measurable goals that are written down on paper.

Secret No.1

How to break bad habits and build ones?

Habits become hard to break to because they are deeply wired by constant repetition into our brains. Bad habits interrupt your life and prevent you from accomplishing your goals. They jeopardize your health — both mentally and physically. And they waste your time and energy. But habits are also patterns of behavior and it is the breaking of patterns that are the key to breaking the habits themselves. Usually there is a clear trigger to starts the pattern. Sometimes the triggers are emotional — the wanting a drink or cigarette or nail-biting driven by stress. Other times the trigger is more simply situational and environmental: You see the TV and couch as soon as you hit the front door, and now your brain connects the dots, and eating dinner in front of the TV on the couch is not far behind. More often it is a combination of both — the mix of social anxiety and the party environment leads to your heavier drinking.

Choose a habit you care about doing regularly. Don’t worry about whether other people think it’s important. For instance, don’t try to exercise every day because you think you should. It won’t be long before your motivation for doing that habit will wane and you’ll be relying on willpower alone to get you through (not a great idea—we only have so much willpower, so you want to find a way to build habits without relying on it too much).

If you choose, on the other hand, to walk your dog every day or to play outside with your kids, those habits might come with a lot more motivation for your personally than going to the gym. And yet, they happen to include some exercise. See how that works?

Find something you’re motivated to do. You’ll need that motivation to keep you going, since habits can be an uphill battle until they become ingrained.

The more often you do your habit, the stronger it will become. Each repetition enforces it as a behavior and strengthens the pathways in your brain related to it. Eventually, all that repetition makes the behavior automatic, something you do without thinking about it, which is when we call it a habit.

If you’re only doing something once or twice a week, it’s going to take a long time for that behavior to develop into a habit. You’re spending more of your week not doing it.

Try to find a habit you can track every day, or every weekday at least. The more you do it, the faster you’ll develop it into a real habit.

If you aim to run 5km every day after not exercising for the past two years, you probably won’t keep that up for long. To keep on track with your new habit you need to choose something achievable so you’ll always feel that if you make the effort you can do it.

The last thing you want is ability getting in the way when you’re already battling with your willpower.

If you need to choose something tiny to start with, go for it. Better a tiny habit that you do every day than a huge one you hardly ever complete.

Secret No.2

How to identify which are Wasteful Habits?

Habits can be difficult to change, but it is possible to replace them with new behaviors. When you replace bad habits with activities that focus on that worthwhile 20 percent, you’ll find yourself much more successful in the same amount of–or perhaps even less–time per week.

People will always want to schedule meetings. It makes them feel more productive, but if there is nothing to gain, it ends up being just a big fat waste of time. Know what you’re getting into before stepping foot into a meeting before you just waste time talking about what could be or what could have been.

Getting rid of bad people is probably even more crucial than bringing in great people. If you don’t get the wrong people out quickly, you’re only doing half your job. It might sound like a rationalization, but it is quite likely that you’re doing a favor to this employee if you make that decision sooner, and let them go. It can be beneficial to everyone involved, with no hard feelings.

Cut those customers who always want something but don’t pay. The ones that don’t value what you have to offer, and constantly question your prices. If they don’t value you now, they never will, and you’ll constantly be justifying the work you do, no matter how cheap.

Cut them loose. Give them the heave-ho. tell them goodbye and never look back. Only work with clients who appreciate your value.

We have been trained to look for shortcuts. Copy-pasting, plagiarizing, repurposing, skimming, the list goes on and on. But in my experience, shortcuts always lead to failed projects and unhappy clients. 

Hopefully, someone will catch the mistakes inherent in shortcuts and make you fix it, or start over from scratch. You spend more time fixing the mistake than you saved by taking the shortcut; if it’s the who client catches these mistakes, not only will it cost you time and money, but also their respect and confidence. 

Do you come into the office with a plan? Do you have an agenda for that day or week? Do you know what items you need to tackle today and in what order

If not, then congratulations: you’re “winging it”.

To “wing” something means to enter any situation without a plan of action. When you “wing” your day, you get pulled into every meeting, and you usually respond to every call. 

By starting your day with a plan of your priorities, you don’t waste time, and you know what items take priority; not only do the most important tasks get accomplished first, but you are able to finish more tasks overall because you waste less time leaving items half-finished and coming back to them later.

Secret No.3

How to value your time & leverage it to make its best use?

Sure, tactics like maintaining “to-do” lists (or “done” lists), setting goals, and decreasing the amount and time of meetings can all help. But really, these are all tactics that fall into a strategical category of leveraging our time.

Leverage is an awesome force–it allows us to multiply our abilities by applying a little pressure to something.

What a sharp contrast from our modern day! Now, words are cheap: they are everywhere, constantly bombarding us with useless information and trivial tweets. Heartfelt letters to a lover are rare. More often, we see texts sent with emoticons and mutilated misspellings.

The sad truth is, few of us place value in the words we speak. We open our mouths to hear the music of our own voices, rarely considering the worth of what we are saying.

A man’s reputation can be ruined by loose lips. Just look at politics. The more we say, the more likely we are to say something stupid. The sheer volume of words issuing from our mouths statistically invites idiocy. We all have had moments when we’ve made everyone laugh a few times, but it all stops when we say something off-putting. The humor quickly evaporates, leaving us with reddened faces.

Especially when dealing with our bosses or members of the opposite sex, we can be tempted to avoid awkward silence by filling it with even more awkward chatter. This can inevitably lead to saying something regrettable and possibly offensive.

The less we talk, the more we observe! Our idle words that flow from our mouths with little consequence, are often the outpouring of our minds chattering away. When we stop talking, restraining our words, we will find that that the voice inside also grows silent. This allows us to get out of the world in our heads, and look at the world around us, seeing things that we might not have noticed before.

On the range, inattention to the world around you was dangerous. The very land itself was ready to kill you at any moment. If you were idly talking about nothing with your guard down, you wouldn’t have noticed a hostile enemy creeping up behind you with knife in hand.

While we don’t necessarily need to be worried about being scalped at the office, being absorbed in our world is still dangerous. It can range from not seeing the car pulling out in front of you or failing to observe a girl is interested in you. When we pull ourselves from the constant flow of words in our minds and out of our mouths, it frees us to really see what is going on in our lives.

When speaking to others, it is good to keep what you are saying in the right tone. Telling jokes while attending a funeral isn’t often a great idea.

Is there impact to what you are about to say? When you speak, you should have a better reason for what you say than, “I wanted to.” Ideally, everything you say should have a purpose or reason. Maybe your friend is feeling down and you know that he loves a good joke. Your girlfriend has had a bad day, so you tell her something encouraging that you love about her. The goal is to reduce the amount of unnecessary things you say, because it’s usually the unnecessary words we later regret.

No doubt, at times a cowboy would give someone a piece of his mind, regardless of whether or not it hurt the other’s feelings. This was done with courage because it could easily provoke a gunfight and had more behind it than mere spite. Today, we don’t often come to blows or gunfire over insults, but that doesn’t mean we should weigh the consequences less. Speaking the truth hurts at times. Saying off-handedly to your wife or girlfriend that the dinner she made was OK may not seem harmful; but the comment may hurt them more than you realize.

 At the end of the day, we don’t have much more than our reputations. A Cowboy certainly didn’t. We should take care that our words don’t reflect badly on ourselves. The easiest way for a powerful man to seem foolish is to run his mouth off, revealing to all how little control he actually has over himself. What we choose to say often reveals our character.

Secret No.4

How Time Log should be used to maintain your focus?

The problem with working harder is that it simply doesn’t work. The human brain isn’t designed to operate at full power all day long. Rather than helping you get closer to your goals, trying to focus for extended periods of time can fry your mental circuits, making it impossible to think clearly. As a result, your decision-making and creativity suffer, and your work slows to a crawl. Focus also involves an understanding of what is worthy of your distraction.

Many people wish they had more time to do all they want to do, but they’re ‘just so busy’.

Keeping a time log is a simple and surprisingly effective way to boost your productivity, get what needs to be done actually done, and realize just how ‘busy’ you’ve really been.

In many respects, it’s the first step you need to take because it makes you aware of just how you’re spending your time — the key to managing yourself more effectively.

Just by making the effort to record and analyze how you spend your day will itself raise awareness of your time and how you’re using it.

The time you invest to do it will almost certainly be paid back to you many times over as you become more conscious of how much your time matters?

Keeping a personal time management log helps you identify what you’re spending too long on… or not doing enough!

It’s surprising just how disruptive and destructive a break in focus can be for your productivity.

Often, it’s only when you look back that you can see just how much time was wasted on low value activities that you could easily outsource to others, or not get involved in at all.

Spot patterns that highlight what times of day you’re most likely to be productive, and also when you’re less so. Knowing your patterns of productivity is useful for planning.

Secret No.5

How to watch your perspective of life and keep updating it?

Perspective has many definitions, such as the ability to understand what is important and what isn’t, and the capacity to view things in their true relationship or relative importance. If you are only thinking about problems and sorrows, that’s exactly what are you going to attract in your life. If you change your perspective and start thinking about solutions and opportunities, you are sending vibrations to attract an abundance of them.

Are you having trouble looking for the silver lining? Feeling burned out can negatively affect your life as well as your career.

Try writing a page or two on what you would like to do with the rest of your life. Don’t worry about grammar, practicalities or priorities. Just create that dream list.

Record your thoughts, feelings and hopes, or tell them to a trusted friend. With someone to witness them, you’ll feel responsible for making some changes.

Secret No.6

How to align your actions with your goals?

It’s nice to have goals. The act of setting goals along makes you much more likely to achieve them.

But having goals isn’t enough. It’s far too easy to jot down some goals that make you feel good about yourself, only to then get distracted and forget about them altogether.

The key to achieving your goals is really simple. It comes down to aligning your actions with your goals — every single day.

If you want to lose weight, you need to eat better. If you want to build muscle, you need to lift weights. If you want to write a book, you need to start writing.

And if you want to grow your business, you need to start doing some marketing.

Goals are helpful to direct your steps. But more important than goals is the strong reason “why” you work for those goals.

When you know the deep reason why you seek for them, you’ll be more motivated to push through.

You’ll intentionally seek for opportunities that align with your “why”. You’ll filter your actions that do not support it. You’ll start your day with clarity. It’s never impossible for you to enjoy life and make a living at the same time. You can work hard or do more and still feel fulfilled.

You lose your journey to a fulfilling life when you settle your eyes on the metrics of others.

When you examine yourself, you slowly find out why you do certain actions.

When employees don’t know their company’s mission, vision or core values, they are left with a lack of direction. Instead, they need to be aware of how their projects fit into the overall organizational framework and how their specific contributions impact company strategy.

The key here is alignment. Employees at all levels need to be aligned on their companies’ larger goals, and those goals need to be broken down to a smaller scale to ensure that people remain engaged in day-to-day operations.

Managers who consistently provide feedback can help keep employees focused on their performance. Feedback acts as a reminder. Without it, employees get too caught up in their daily tasks and lose sight of the bigger picture.

Employees see the value in feedback, as well. Work board found that 72 percent of employees surveyed thought their performance would improve with more feedback. Job feedback should focus on growth and forward thinking by and how employees can learn from their mistakes.  

Additionally, employers should seek feedback from their staff. If employees feel that they aren’t informed properly or are missing information, they should be able to speak up.

If, for example, a tenured employee finds new directives to be off track, he or she should be able to express concerns and ask how a particular project contributes to the overall organizational goals.

Employees should know their role in each of their projects. To help them do this, you can use visuals to explain the company’s overall strategy and how each role advances toward its goals. Some project-management platforms provide real-time goal-tracking and present it in charts and graphs to demonstrate individual and group progress.

It’s also important to assign the right tasks to the right people. Use feedback and performance reviews to understand each employee’s level of competency and what his or her strengths are, to maintain and even improve productivity. If particular employees excel at closing sales deals, put them on the front line on client presentations.

Tasks, further, should challenge an employee to grow. Consistent feedback lets employers know their employees’ plan to evolve, which in turn informs the assignment of projects. If, for example, a tenured employee wants to expand his or her skill set and learn more about research and development, the employer can integrate that individual’s role with that department.

Engagement is essential to keep a company growing and reaching for its vision. When employees aren’t recognized, they lose track of their purpose. But in contrast, when wins are celebrated, employees want to win more.  

A simple expression of gratitude, such as a thank-you note or gift, shows employees that management is paying attention and notices that they are consistently working hard and succeeding at their individual goals.

When recognizing top talent, explain how employees’ efforts are pushing the company toward large-scale goals. Show how their performance is meeting and exceeding expectations to encourage more hard work and dedication.

Secret No.7

How to keep in mind that your first duty is to yourself for bringing Sensation Success in your life?

It’s the easiest thing in the world to give up from a failure. The only way to push on is if you have the true burning desire to succeed, to not be moved or dissuaded from your goals.

What is success to you? How to be successful in life?

To some, when they think of success, they imagine wealth; others want power; some just want to make a positive impact on the world.

All of these are perfectly valid, indeed success is a concept that means different things to different people. Though no matter what success is to you, it almost certainly isn’t something will come easily.

There are countless guides and books to being successful, however, as success is personal and unique to each individual. The advice contained in these books can often not be relevant. Therefore following the advice of a single individual can often be unhelpful.

With this in mind, considering the advice of a great many people, people whose ideas of success were different both to each other, and quite possibly, to you can be a good alternative.

Understand that life is the ultimate video game: It keeps leveling up, and you have to level up with it.

Do something well enough that you make it look easy. Even if it takes 10,000 hours to get there, it’ll be worth it in the end. Figure out what your values are and stick with them. Kindness is a scarce and valuable resource. Cherish it.

Fear is the number one thing holding you back from what you want to do. Be brave enough to follow your heart. Not enough people will be.

Perspective comes when you’re not in the middle of the situation. The best view of the NYC skyline is in New Jersey, not on Fifth Avenue.

Trust your gut. When your spidery sense is tingling, pay close attention. Somehow it knows better than you do when something is right or wrong.

You will never know how much space you take up in someone else’s world.

Wounding people binds them to you more deeply than kindness. Just look at the Joker and Harley Quinn.

With that said, try to leave people better off than you found them. Leaving them worse off will have repercussions for them far beyond just you, touching everyone they interact with in the future (i.e., if you’re the first ex-boyfriend who broke her heart, she will be guarded around every man she meets after you. If you’re that first terrible boss at work, he will be jaded for the rest of his career. Just something to think about.)

Try not to use people as a means to an end. They can tell. So can you.

Most of the time, people are not trying to hurt you on purpose. Usually their actions are driven by self-interest, not malice.

Give people a second chance, if they deserve one.

Insecurity is a bitch; it bleeds into everything and can come out in unexpected ways. Be careful with your insecurities and especially careful with those of others.

The easiest way to be happy is to not be outcome-dependent.

The best relationships are like fine wine: They get better and better over time.

Whenever you can, pay it forward.

You have to have a reason for being. If your why is strong enough, then your how will fall into place. You will figure out a way.

If you’re wondering why it’s so important to do what you love, it’s because work takes up so much of your life. The vast majority of your most productive waking hours will be spent at work, so in order to love your life, you have to love what you do for a living.

The Ultimate guide to give up your bad habits

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Habits are routine behaviors done on a regular basis. They are recurrent and often unconscious patterns of behavior and are acquired through frequent repetition. Many of these are unconscious as we don’t even realize we are doing them. It is a settled or regular tendency or practice, especially one that is hard to give up. Habit, from the standpoint of psychology, [as] a more or less fixed way of thinking, willing, or feeling acquired through previous repetition of a mental experience. Habitual behavior often goes unnoticed in persons exhibiting it. Habitual behavior often goes unnoticed in persons exhibiting it, because a person does not need to engage in self-analysis when undertaking routine tasks. Habits are sometimes compulsory. When behaviors are repeated in a consistent context, there is an incremental increase in the link between the context and the action. This increases the automatically of the behavior in that context

Bad habits interrupt your life and prevent you from accomplishing your goals. They jeopardize your health — both mentally and physically. And they waste your time and energy.

So why do we still do them? And most importantly, is there anything you can do about it?

We all have a bad habit or two we could stand to lose, but habits are hard to break. Whether your bad habit is procrastinating, overspending, swearing, or any other one you want to change.

Features of an automatic behavior are all or some of:

•        Efficiency

•        Lack of awareness

•        Unintentionality

•        Uncontrollability

How habits are formed?

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Habit formation is the process by which a behavior, through regular repetition, becomes automatic or habitual. This is modelled as an increase in automaticity with number of repetitions up to an asymptote. This process of habit formation can be slow.

As the habit is forming, it can be analyzed in three parts: the cue, the behavior, and the reward. The cue is the thing that causes the habit to come about, the trigger of the habitual behavior. This could be anything that one’s mind associates with that habit and one will automatically let a habit come to the surface.

Take complete responsibility for your actions. You are the king or queen of your actions — no one is responsible for them but you. When you get behind the driver’s seat after three too many drinks that is your decision. In some ways, it may be more practical than getting on a bus or hailing a taxi, but it’s still your decision. Whether you want to or not, you own up to your decisions at some point.

  • Realizing that you are completely responsible for your actions can leave you feeling overwhelmed or even paralyzed at first. You begin to realize that each of your actions has repercussions, and that those repercussions are wildly different than the ones you may have imagined when you acted in the first place. It’s a scary thought.
  • But ultimately, being completely responsible for your actions is empowering. You are the maker of your own destiny. Within certain norms, no one else can tell you what to do. Taking full responsibility for your actions gives you freedom. You begin to understand how habits can be metaphorical chains, and how breaking them can set you free.

Shopping habits are particularly vulnerable to change at “major life moments” like graduation, marriage, birth of first child, moving to a new home, and divorce. Some stores use purchase data to try to detect these events and take advantage of the marketing opportunity.

Some habits are known as “keystone habits”, and these influence the formation of other habits. For example, identifying as the type of person who takes care of their body and is in the habit of exercising regularly, can also influence eating better and using credit cards less.

A recent study by Adriaanse et al. (2014) found that habits mediate the relationship between self-control and unhealthy snack consumption. The results of the study empirically demonstrate that high-self-control may influence the formation of habits and in turn affect behavior.

Importance of habits

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The habit–goal interface or interaction is constrained by the particular manner in which habits are learned and represented in memory. Specifically, the associative learning underlying habits is characterized by the slow, incremental accrual of information over time in procedural memory. Habits can either benefit or hurt the goals a person sets for themselves.

Goals guide habits by providing the initial outcome-oriented motivation for response repetition. In this sense, habits are often a trace of past goal pursuit. Although, when a habit forces one action, but a conscious goal pushes for another action, an oppositional context occurs. When the habit prevails over the conscious goal, a capture error has taken place.

Behavior prediction is also derived from goals. Behavior prediction is to acknowledge the likelihood that a habit will form, but in order to form that habit, a goal must have been initially present. The influence of goals on habits is what makes a habit different from other automatic processes in the mind.

There are a number of habits possessed by individuals that can be classified as nervous habits. These include nail-biting, stammering, sniffling, and banging the head. They are known as symptoms of an emotional state and are generally based upon conditions of anxiety, insecurity, inferiority and tension. These habits are often formed at a young age and may be because of a need for attention. When trying to overcome a nervous habit it is important to resolve the cause of the nervous feeling rather than the symptom which is a habit itself or as a result one could experience anxiety. Anxiety is a disorder known for excessive and unexpected worry that negatively impacts an individual’s daily life, and routines.

Behavior modification refers to behavior-change procedures that were employed during the 1970s and early 1980s. Based on methodological behaviorism, overt behavior was modified with presumed consequences, including artificial positive and negative reinforcement contingencies to increase desirable behavior, or administering positive and negative punishment and/or extinction to reduce problematic behavior. For the treatment of phobias, habituation and punishment were the basic principles used in flooding, a subcategory of desensitization.

Behavior modification relies on the following:

•        Reinforcement (positive and negative)

•        Punishment (positive and negative)

•        Extinction

•        Shaping

•        Fading

•        Chaining

Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is a psycho-social intervention that aims to improve mental health. CBT focuses on challenging and changing unhelpful cognitive distortions (e.g. thoughts, beliefs, and attitudes) and behaviors, improving emotional regulation, and the development of personal coping strategies that target solving current problems. Originally, it was designed to treat depression, but its use has been expanded to include treatment of a number of mental health conditions, including anxiety.

3 ways to form a good habit

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Forming a new good habit can be a struggle, but it is well worth the effort. Having more good habits can help to achieve better overall health or accomplish a larger goal. Some things that you can do to form a new habit include identifying your motivation, creating a cue, and tracking your progress. If you have a bad habit you want to get rid of, just keep in mind that you may need to take steps before trying to replace it with a new good habit.

  1. Making a Plan

Before you can begin to work on your new habit, it is worthwhile to consider your goal. Figure out exactly what you hope to accomplish. Make sure that your goal is specific, measurable, action oriented, realistic, and time bound (SMART) to increase your chances of success. Consider what you want to achieve and get as detailed as you can.


2. Identify the habit you want to form. 

Having good habits that are in line with the goals you want to achieve can improve your chances of attaining your goals. After you have set your goal and worked out all of the specifics of achieving that goal, identify a habit that is part of achieving that goal. Consider your goal and ask yourself, what good habit would help me accomplish this goal?

  • Consider your motivation. 

Once you have identified your goal and the new habit you need to form to accomplish this goal, take some time to consider your motivation. Your motivation is the reason you want to form this new habit. Good motivation can be the difference between succeeding and failing at forming a new habit, so take your time to consider your motivation.

If your habit is to hike regularly, you’re not going to climb Everest this weekend. If you have a big goal, like getting a new job, running a marathon or going to the gym five days a week, you need to break your goal down into increments. For example, if you want to run a marathon and you’re not much of a runner, try running two miles a day three days a week and build on that. If you try and do too much, you will most likely fail and destroy your morale. Have patience, start small and build on your progress.

Set yourself up for success. If you do not go to the gym because you forget your gym clothes, start packing them the night before. If you are forgetting to pack your lunch, pack it the night before. Too tired to go to the gym? Schedule a time and treat it like an appointment. Enable your habits by addressing your usual excuses and obstacles and preparing for success.

What gets measured gets managed. If you are trying to get a new job, keep track of how many applications you send and how many network connections you make and build on it. Measuring your progress also helps keep you motivated as you work towards your goal.

Everyone fails, and at some point you will as well and that is just fine. Whether you cheat on a diet, skip a work out, fail to send a job application that day or whatever it is, just get back in the saddle tomorrow. Success is often about not giving up in spite of rejection and failure, so do not lose heart when you experience a setback, keep working.

It’s no use beating yourself up when you don’t meet all of your goals. This is only going to make you angry with yourself. It’s easy to walk away from something when we are mad or disappointed in ourselves. So try to take the frustration out of by rewarding yourself for sticking to it for five days, ten days, etc.

Sticking to a new habit doesn’t have to cause you stress, and it shouldn’t feel like a burden that keeps you from living the life you want. If you are working towards the right goals, you should feel happy with yourself for making progress. You should feel good about yourself and the future.

Do your daily activities make it easy to perform your new habit? Perhaps integrating the new habit into something you already do will help put this new activity into regular practice.

10 critical characteristics of your personality to realize your dream

Self Development:

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Self Development is a very important aspect of the human being.
In today’s life the modern man finds himself trapped in a concrete jungle, living a rat race. This is a life full of stress, tensions and anxieties to be the star performer at the workplace, and to be perceived as an ideal son, husband and father at home.
In this continuing madness, he tends to loose his sense of self and finds himself loosing control over his live, powerless as he is to take corrective and remedial action. Such inability to do what is right and bring things back on track is largely caused by the lack of realization of what is wrong and what needs to be done.
The answer to this problem is Self Development.
But what is self development? As the term suggested it is bringing about all round improvement in one’s own self. A plain dictionary meaning of the term by itself would bring cold comfort to someone who really needs self development.
We therefore need to understand what self-development is by understanding what it implies. Self development can be best understood by examining its components. These are enumerated one by one:

  • Self awareness
  • Self knowledge
  • Communication
  • Career
  • Self potential
  • Health – physical and psychological
  • Social status
  • Social relations
  • Personality

1. Self awareness: What is self awareness?

Self awareness is the understanding of where one finds himself. What does he considers as his duty every moment of the day? How is he supposed to utilize each waking moment of his time? What should he say? How and to whom? A high sense of self awareness is seen in person who is proactive in thought, alert in mind and body and energetic in action. Such is person stays ahead in every situation.

2. Self knowledge:

Self knowledge flows from self awareness. Self knowledge enables a person to truly understand himself – his role and contribution to society. Self knowledge is also a self appraisal of the strengths and weaknesses of the personality and character on an ongoing basis. Self knowledge is also the knowledge of the inner universe of an individual – the knowledge of which is vital to successfully navigate the outer universe.

3. Communication:

Communication is the vehicle for building social relations. This was true in the days when technology and internet did not exist; but is has become even more true today when we are living in a deeply interconnected world. Communication has various aspects these are:

  1. Thoughts and Ideas:Communication originates in the mind in the form of a thought which is translated into an idea to be expressed. A creative mind is fertile ground for positive expression, whereas a negative mind is minefield of hate filled negative communication.
  2. Voice & Speech:The voice represents the emotion and the level of self confidence of the individual.  The speech represents the spoken words manifested by the eloquence or lack of it in expressing the ideas of the mind.

4. Morale, Self-confidence & Self Esteem:

What is morale? A high morale refers to a very positive state of mind of a person which is ever challenged into seeking increasing difficult tasks to achieve. Low morale represents the opposite  where all round pessimism pervades; and where procrastination and dreariness are the norm.
An individual’s morale depends upon his self-confidence. The self-confidence in turn depends upon the self-esteem of the individual. A person with low sense of self esteem has little self-confidence to do the simplest of tasks, while claiming both ownership and responsibility for the same. On the other hand a person with a high sense of self esteem always lunges forward, taking bold and calculated risks. Such a person always stretches himself in a quest to continuously improve his productivity, and sense of self fulfillment in his life and in his work.

5. Career:

Gone are the days when a person could take up a secure career in a government job and work until his retirement doing pretty much the same work. Today, career development has become very important in today’s very fast changing and dynamic world. This implies staying relevant with the changing times by adapting one’s skills and abilities to meet the changing requirements of society and the work place.

6. Potential:

Each one of us has a latent, immense and untapped potential which sadly few of us achieve. The main reason for remaining underachievers is equally to lack of self belief in our potential as also the knowledge that such a potential even exists. Self development really starts where we become aware of our immense potential and start taking positive steps to tap it and creatively utilize it.

7. Health:

Health has two aspects – physical and psychological. Good health commonly is commonly understood only as a state where the body remain free from ailments. There is general ignorance about the impact of an healthy mind (free of negative thoughts and emotions) on the physical health of an individual. It is often said a fit mind in a fit body. However, the reverse is equally true – a fit mind ensures that the body remains fit and free from many ‘lifestyle’ diseases.

8. Social Status:

Development of the social status refers to the upward move of individual on the social ladder. The craving for a high social status is considered the highest of the famous Manslow’s personal self actualization hierarchy. A high social status represents his desire for self actualization. Maslow describes this level as the desire to accomplish everything that one can, to become the most that one can be.

9. Social Relations:

Social relations determine the social status of a person. At the same time the person’s social status also determines his social relations. Development of the ability to develop social relations gives an individual the power to increase his ever widening circle of social contacts. This in turn enhances his power, his prestige, sense of self worth and most importantly his social status.
Personality : 
Personality Development seems to be the buzz word these days. While everyone likes to talk about it, few seem to truly understand. Development of one’s personality is more than adherence to a mere set of guidelines to be followed in terms of dos and don’ts. Personality has several important components that need to be understood and developed. These include:

  1. Posture: An erect posture signifies confidence, a positive forthright attitude, and a fit body that consciously receives large amount s of life giving oxygen into the lungs.
  2. Body Language: This represents the non verbal communication that translates and conveys more than 80% of the message and is often more important than the spoken words.
  3. Thoughts and self belief: Each individual creates his own universe through self-belief about himself and thoughts about others. Such thoughts and self beliefs either fashion a mind full of prejudice, hate and envy at the negative level or love, empathy and positivity on the other.
  4. Attitude: It is said our attitude determines our altitude. Development of the attitude involves moving away from being negative about persons, and events and seeing some good in everything perceived as bad.

The above stated aspects of self development are by no means an exhaustive list of what one must do for oneself. At the same, these are not water tight compartments that need to be looked in isolation. Often development of a single area can have greater than proportionate effect in other areas. So what one essentially needs to do it to focus and try to better understand each and consciously inculcate the habit to bring about self improvements howsoever small for the overall objective of self development.

Implementing your goals

  1. Why do you set your goals? Let’s consider this basic question. The simple answer is that you are not happy with your present status and you want to improve. Now let’s consider who is responsible for your present status? Your circumstances, influence of your parents, teachers, friends, relatives, neighbor and all those who have been interacting with you. They have influenced you mind which in turn has influenced your actions and behavior. Over the years you have formed some habits. Triggered by your habits, you continue to do the same things over and over again. Your relationships with others remain the same. Nothing changes. Therefore you don’t own what you want; you don’t garner respect from others. Life is drudgery. Nothing to look forward to. You accept that this reality and you have to live with it. And then, you write down your goals. These could be about health, career, finance, family, hobby and even spirituality.
  2. Once we understand that you background and habits have brought you to a situation which you are not happy with, you need to do whatever it takes to change these influences and most importantly change your habits. You may not be able to change company of everyone around you, but you can choose to divide your time according to your choice.

10. Self-Belief

To be connected with earlier chapter.
In life it is necessary to have some beliefs. That does not mean that you need to follow any dogma or belief forced on you. You can pick your own beliefs with discretion. First, let us understand what is self-belief. What are the qualities that it inherits? Self belief is an invaluable virtue which brings great possibilities in your life. Its indications are that you:

  • Stop making any excuses for any reason what-so-ever.
  • Do not indulge in any negative thought.
  • Stop thinking that difficulties surround you alone. You do not jump to conclusion and take hasty actions. You express your fears to others without any hesitation, because you keep in mind that everyone has some fears.
  • You stop procrastinating because that is indicative of your lack of confidence.
  • Stop pursing perfection. Perfection is never achieved. It only stops you from moving ahead.

Once you develop self belief and you observe that you confirm to all what has been said above, you will find the following eight advantages coming to you smoothly and seamlessly.

  1. Self-belief enables you to hold strong conviction. All things do not happen the way you have planned or the way you expect. But strong conviction will help you to move ahead without fear of failure.
  2. Self belief also helps you develop optimistic attitude which is necessary today in the wake of fast changing world. Life is becoming extremely competitive. Any opportunity missed once may never come back again. But if you have a negative attitude you will not be able to catch the fleeting possibilities.
  3. Your self-belief also makes you more reliable to others.Thus you tend to build up better relations with others. Your credibility is not question. Since people can trust you they vie for good relations with you. Needless to say that for any significant project you need help from others.
  4. Self-belief also helps you to be focused and self motivated. You no longer take life as it comes. You don’t depend on unknown sources to bring you luck. You carve your own destiny. Self motivation helps you to maintain enthusiasm and interest in life.
  5. Your risk taking ability improves if you start relying on yourself. It is said that there are no gains if there are no risks. Your conviction helps you to take calculated risks in meeting the challenges of life. The tendency to avoid and escape facing challenging situation reduces substantially. You start realizing that difficulties form a necessary part of life.
  6. Further, self-belief enables you to give and receive constructive criticism with an open mind. In the current scenario exchange of ideas and views are extremely important. The autocratic leader is not acceptable any more. So if you want to progress you have to collaborate with others from your own organization or outside outfits.
  7. Self-belief helps you to be more assertive. You start caring for yourself more than pleasing others. Someone said that he doesn’t know any formula of how to succeed. The sure short formula for success has never been discovered. But there is a firm unbeatable formula for failure and that is trying to please everyone. Your self-belief will not allow you to embark on the journey of securing approvals where these are not mandatory.
  8. Last but not the least, you start working on improving your self respect.You realize that if you do not respect yourself, others will follow suit. When you’re in need to raise self esteem, you become more effective and you become more productive. Now, you start managing your time very effectively as any improper or inadequate use of your time will hurt your self-esteem.

Personal Productivity

Personal Productivity and its review constitute are essential ingriedients in the implementation and achievement of personal goals. But what is personal productivity? Does it mean how we manage our time? The answer is yes and no. Yes, time is an important aspect of personal productivity. Rather, it could be so provided your activities are aligned with your goals. And yet it is a lot more. Does it mean one’s achievement towards realization of personal goals? Not just that! Personal goals may change. Personal vision may change. And if one may say so personal mission statement if one ever cares to establish that – that also may change.
When we talk of mission statement or vision or an organization, that hardly ever changes. But when we are talking of an individual, the factors that affect a person’s likes and dislikes, desires, drastically change with changing circumstances, or even without these.
The most important factor for a person’s success is his/her personal productivity. As we growwe realize that it is not just money, not just health, not just family, or your social status, hobbies etc., that bring you happiness, but it is a combination of all these in varying proportions.  So what we need to do is to align all our activities to achieve whatever we want in the aforesaid different fields.
Therefore a daily review of what you do becomes very important. In the highly competitive world we have today, the targets that the organizations set for you are hard ones. These sap your energy and rob you of the power and ability to think what you must do. You only start following sometimes even unachievable targets. In the process, you totally destroy you concept of personal productivity.
Hence, what is really needed is to have the right balance and proper perspective towards life. It is only such a healthy attitude that strikes a right balance between family and friends, home and work, health and money that will lead to a truly happy and successful life.

One Day Public Speaking Workshop on 22nd July 2018

 
Background:
An intensive full day programme offering training on important aspects of verbal communication. This programme covers various exercises that focus on the development of Public Speaking Skills with additional inputs on Voice & Speech enhancement. Video Recording and role-play enhance the interactivity and the effectiveness of the programme. These are further supplemented by specific suggestions on areas of improvement to each candidate. Details of the programme are offered below.
Objectives:

  • Help raise level of consciousness about voice in communication
  • Development of Modulation in tone of Voice
  • Control over nervousness/hesitation etc.
  • Refinement in Communication
  • Fluency in speech; and overall clarity in communication.
  • Poise & Confidence in appearance.

Contents:

  1. Communication & Presentation Skills:

Voice & Speech Training

  • Building better breath control
  • Enhancement of capacity of voice.
  • Effectively using Modulation of Voice
  • Developing cordiality in voice.

Public Speaking Training

  • 2-Minute & 5-Minute presentations
  • Video Recording & Play Back Sessions
  • Preparing a Presentation – Developing the Structure
  • Keeping the Presentation on Track – focus on important points
  • Including the right content
  • Connecting with the audience
  • Handling Stage Fright

Trainer’s Feedback:

  • Personal Feedback on performances
  • Counseling & Guidance on areas of individual improvement

Articulation in Communication

  • Handling Q & As effectively
  • Avoiding verbosity – Sticking to the issue
  • Ensuring an appropriate tone of voice in speech
  • Focus on Speaking Sentences

 
Commercials:
Duration              : One full day of training
Timing                 : 9.00am to 5.30 pm
Venue                  : Nimble Centre, 318/3rd floor, Tulsiani Chembers, Free press road, Nariman Point,
Mumbai – 400021.
With regards,
Satish Kakri
Director,
Nimble Foundation
Contact: 022 22810000/9930527551.
Email ID: info@nimblefoundation.org
Web: www.nimblefoundation.org

6 Stages of Stage fright

Stage fright has been troubling people from the times armorial. One wants to speak to a group, to express himself or herself, they have the ideas and want to share knowledge but the stage fright scares them.
What is stage fright and how does it operate?
I’ll describe six stages of stage fright to explain in totality why and how it takes place. After understanding the root cause of the problem, I will also give suggestions as to how you can avoid stage fright. This video has been prepared for all those friends who are afflicted by the demon called stage fright, but do not know how to avoid, how to overcome or how to conquer this enemy of the human confidence.

Stage 1:  

It starts no sooner you accept the assignment of making a speech. After confirming, you start thinking why did you agree? You are not a public presentation. What if you tail to come up to the expectation of the audience? You will make a tool of yourself and for no reason. Instead of sitting downer and preparing, you harbor these negative thoughts unmil you get involved in your activities.

Stage 2:

These constant negative thoughts start scaring you. You feel something ominous is ahead of you, recollection of the previous occasions when you could not perform well bring a kind of misery. Efforts to prepare the speech even when you sit down to write do not bring positive results. What happens next? What does it lead to?

Stage 3:

Fear provoking thoughts make you anxious. The anxiety starts working. It breeds worry making it extremely difficult to prepare a proper speech. For sure, there are more negative thoughts. And that leads the stage 4.

Stage 4:  

You anxiety is increased with deepening fear and non-preparation. The problem grows and disturbs your logical thinking. But now it’s a point of no return. Some days have passed and there is no way you can come out of the predicament. Then it leads to stage5.

Stage 5:  

Focus on fears, anxiety and worry cause distraction. This makes the task even more difficult. But somehow you prepare the speech. It doesn’t even appeal to you. But you can do nothing. So you are ready but with a substandard speech.

Stage 6:  

You are on the stage. You are nervous. Whatever you had prepared, even that plays hide and seek with you. You start making the same mistakes which you had predicted. Your legs shake, hands shiver voice cracks. Instead of 15 minute speech you could last only for 5 to 6 minutes. Your enemy stage fright had the day of celebration. It had won. You come down as a defeated person.
Now, let me tell you how to tame this wild bull, your victor – the stage fright. I’ll briefly but clearly explain the five steps formula to beat your enemy down.

Step One:

The day you agree to speak, on the same day you should note down the points which you will like to project. Whatever you know is fine. Google out the rest. Having the points is just like collecting your ammunition.

Step Two:

Next day, you go through these points a number of times. You may find some of them not so lethal while you find others like dynamites. Retain the dynamites and throw away the weaklings. Don’t keep anything extra. Now, you are ready to wage a war. You have all the weapons.

Step Three:

Again you go through the points you have now collected. As you have slept over them for 2days, you will find it very easy to put them in proper order. One naturally will lead to another and you will have a good sketon for your speech. It is the framework of your final delivery. Just like a general of an army strategizes the attack and keep ready to wage a war against your abominable enemy stage fright. This done, you must visualize yourself as the victor in the mar. See yourself battling away all the enemies, big and small.

Step Four:

Just visualization will not help. It will inspire to put in all the hard work that lies ahead. Now, for balance days that you have, you must practice, practice and practice. Since it’s your first big battle no am omit of practice is too much. Practice as much as you can but also some more.

Step Five:

On the day of reckoning go to the appointed place at least ½ an hour early. Meet organizers and others who have come. Talk to them informally. You know your subject in and out. You have practiced your speech more number of times than anyone can imagine. You are sure to come out as a winner. Stage fright will be scared of you and you will rock the stage. Wherever there is applause allow people to have their way. Don’t limit their appreciation. Thank them with you facial expression and then centinue. At the end receive compliments grace fully and not sheepishly.
Now you are ready for the next expedition.

Is stuttering curable?

One % of the world population suffers from stuttering as per the available figures. However, various stages of stuttering have been revealed. The topic that we are going to discuss today is whether stuttering is curable or the victim has to live throughout the life with the speech problem.
To understand the answer for this question, it is necessary to find out what is the cause, of stuttering.  Stuttering can happen due to various reasons. It has been observed that 50% of the cases stuttering are hereditary. Besides, there could be medical reasons which we will not talk about as it is beyond the scope of this discussion. Only qualified doctor will be able to comment on that.
What we are talking about is when there is no medical problem but still people stutter. It is necessary to understand how the words are formed and how the voice is created. The voice is created by the process of holding the breath in the lungs and releasing it through vocal cord.  It produces sound not the words. The words are created by the speech organs. There are five speech organs which are; jaw, tongue, teeth, lips and palate. These organs are responsible for creating clear words. And, for bringing about efficacy of your speech. Clarity is critical. There is breath in the lungs and some breath is released when we want to speak. This breath strikes the vocal cord which is like a rubber membrane. The moment it strikes there is vibration and sound is produced but it is only sound. The words are created by the speech organs as I have said above.
These five speech organs work in tandem and words can be created only by using the organs. Furthermore if there is no breath, there can be no speech. In the normal speech, coordination between the mind and the release of breath and the movement by the speech organs are required. But mind thinks 10 times faster than the speech. This is the major problem. Whenever we have to make a speech in front of an audience we tend to forget what we wanted to speak. The person who stutters is in a hurry to say what he has prepared lest he forgets what they had prepared.
The fact is that it is very difficult to speak the way you have prepared. It is said that there are three types of speeches. This is true. One speech that we prepare to deliver. Second is the speech that we would have delivered. Third is the speech that we like to have delivered. But perfect coordination between the mind and the speech works better and controls and the release of breath by the lungs. Speech can therefore be best made when we ensure that there is perfect coordination between the mind that that is the thinking power and the breath in the lungs. It is observed that whenever you are not speaking clearly because of any of your problems, you need to relax and reassure yourself that you will not be in a hurry. You should start habit of thinking and speaking. When you think and speak chances are that you will be able to say what you want to say without stuttering. But it’s a tedious process. You have to continue this practice all the time. Habits die very hard. But you don’t have to forget. If you do, the old habit returns. You have just to accept that you are trying to do something which is difficult. It is bound to take time and effort. Perseverance is something that will come to your rescue.

When we think of the famous people who stuttered, the first name that to mind is that of King George VI, father of present Queen Elizabeth. There is a movie named the ‘King’s Speech’. It depicts not only the effort of the king but also that of the trainer who ensured that there is marked improvement and the King is the able to broadcast the speech. Speech was mandatory in the turbulent times of war with Hitler. Anyone who is having some interest in the subject must watch the movie. It’s also available on YouTube.
When we talk of other famous personalities who stuttered there are many. Marlin Munroe and Julia Roberts are the famous actors. Winston Churchill also stuttered. Tiger Woods does and so does Joe Biden.
In our country the two names which come before us are that of Hrithik Roshan famous actor and his uncle Roshan, the music director. EMS Namboouripad ex- Kerala Chief Minister was another famous personality with the problem. While there is no doubt that complete cure of stuttering is not claimed by any of the speech therapist, some improvement can definitely be achieved, with the continued practice and efforts.

If we go through the example of the King George the VI, it is depicted in the movie referred above; we find that more than a qualified speech therapist the trainer, the dedicated speech trainer may be in a better position to help. Its replacing the fallacious speech habits with those which will work. One may find the course of Voice Culture training of great advantage. It’s so not only for the people who stutter but also for those who want to speak impeccable language.
Thank you.

How to overcome depression?

How to overcome depression?

What is depression? Often, a demanding situation creates a confusion. It causes mental stress, physical stress and also psychological stress. When a person is not able to cope up with the stress created by these difficult situations he or she falls into depression. It is a state when the person the starts feeling that there is no way out for them. Life appears to be difficult and spirit of hopelessness prevails. In such circumstances the person becomes a pessimist and feels that there is no solution to their problems. In such a hopeless situation the victim finds that life is the absolutely meaningless. In extreme cases the victim also thinks of ending the life by committing a suicide.
  1. What are the physical symptoms of such a state?

The person does not feel like eating anything. Appetite is totally lost. Even if the victim was fond of eating or a foodie, they will no longer like to eat anything. The interest of food is lost because of the depression.The second indication is that the person keeps on brooding on the same spot again and again. The mind does notwork creatively anymore. Old problems appear to be very large and solutions not to be seen. Even if the victim was fond of music, in the state of depression he or she will not like to listen to music ,State of hopelessness becomes a sea of trouble and it is difficult to come out of it.

2.Once, we understand the state of depression or what is depression, it is necessary to find out the reasons.

Each person may have different reasons. Some of them maybe common but in order to work out the solution, it is necessary to understand the specific reasons which have pushed the victim into depression. For students, it could be classroom difficulties, something that has happened in the school, in the class or among peers. The peer pressure takes its toll and often creates an unwanted and undesirable pressure. Likewise, for an executive, it can be a boardroom pressure. If a person knows something but he is not able to explain for whatever reasons, he comes under pressure. Some people are able to adjust to these situations or to difficult people, while others are not able to do so. Further, pressure can also be caused by inadequate social interaction. If there is not sufficient trust among the spouses and each tries to hide certain things even that can create a pressure.

3.Studies have revealed that US is the most depressed country.

She is followed by Columbia, Ukraine, Netherlands and France. Survey reveals that rich are more depressed than the poor. Events of life are important to create an impact on the psyche of a person. While there are less variations in the life of the poor the same can be alarming among the people who are opulent.Further, depression can also be caused due to some infirmities in the personality. Some people are over emotional. They may also be negative thinkers. The negative attitude of a person surely takes him towards depression. It is necessary, therefore to ensure that the attitude of a person is appropriate to correct the shortcoming.
  1. Depression can also be a serious medical problem.

The person who continuously worries also finds the life a burden. His hopes are Diminished. His desire to do something creative dies out. Not able to do anything imaginative, the person feels useless and therefore the depression aggravates.

  1. Finally, we must talk about how to come out of depression.

The first important thing is that one must maintain a proper regime of exercise. Exercise helps. Next in importance is sleep.One need to sleep 7 to 8 hours daily. If one does not go to gym or have any kind of rigorous exercise, just a morning walk for about half an hour is also found very useful.It is also necessary to he eat healthy food. Junk food or fried and spicy food create indigestion which in turn reflects in ones energy level. It also reduces mental alertness. The healthy food includes lot of fiber. It is found in fruits and vegetables. One needs to take a lot of salad along with the cereals.

  1. Keeping a aloof and being lonely

Can be another cause for depression. Man is a social animal and it is necessary that we should mingle with others. When we interact with others we exchange ideas which makes moments interesting. On the other side if you remain alone, you keep on brooding which does not create any imaginative environment. And finally one can gain strength of character by reading the books of the great leaders. Abraham Lincoln the most respect of U.S president is a great example. He failed in business, public life, lost his beloved in young age ,did become a mental
wreck but came out as a winner due to his resilience and positive altitude. so we must be resilient. These and such other examples are enough to convince us that we ourselves are not too bad. The self esteem which might have gone down returns because there is a ray of hope.
Thanks for reading!

Seven Proven Techniques about how to come out of Deep Sadness?

Often, we find that we become sad due to some small reason. It could be anything which happened not as we had visualized. It could be erroneous behavior of somebody we relied on and things like that. But sadness never helps us. It further aggravates the problem. We lose time. We lose energy too. When we are sad, we do not feel like doing something which will be self satisfying. In fact we would not like to work on any project where application of mind and some physical efforts are required. So what should we do? In any case we should try to conquer the malady and come out of it. But how can we do that? I am giving below some such actions which have proved to be very useful if you suffer from the state of sadness.
  1. Practice mindfulness

Mindfulness is focusing on the present. When we are sad and when we know that sadness is not going to help we should encourage ourselves to do something creative. No doubt mindfulness is difficult. But with practice it can become a matter of habit. It will have multiple advantages. You become a better manager of time. You will understand that sadness is sheer wastage of time which can be better utilized by doing something which you love. Time is better utilized in doing something creative.

  1. Learn to forgive others and also yourself.

Oftentimes, it is observed that primary reason of becoming sad is our observation  that we have not lived up to the demand of the situation and/or occasion. We have not carried out our duty the way it should have been done. Thus we tend to become sad because of our own mistakes. At such times, you need to realize that it is not abnormal. People at all levels make mistakes. Try to think if you have met anybody who doesn’t make mistakes; you will find none. Thus, there is no reason to be upset with you. Forgive yourself and move on. Sadness can also occur when we are betrayed by some of colleague, family member, social associate etc. But in reality people are always more concerned with their own interest. Therefore it is not something uncommon when there is a clash of interest they will not bother about our expectation from them even if they had promised to do. But, as you must forgive yourself,  you need to forgive them as well. This will surely bring peace.
  1. Start doing some exercise.

Exercise takes away your attention away from the current sadness. You start to focus on doing something which requires energy as well as application of mind. Survey reveals that this type of distraction is very valuable to conquer sadness. You don’t have to run a marathon. You can simply go for a walk but in a lively place. If you are a member of a club and it is within your reach then go to the club and enjoy the company of your friends or even other people who are not very close to you. It will change your mood. The change in atmosphere will also help.
  1. Ward of negative self talk

It has been observed that when you are sad you start thinking of the past when you were in similar state. This has, unfortunately, a snowballing effect. You must remind yourself that you have to deliberately come out of undesirable state. It is your interest not to remain in that state. It will definitely require your initiative determination and action. Not easy! But with practice it becomes achievable.

Company of happy people

It’s a good habit to remain in the company of happy people. You should choose your friends. You can surely avoid company of people who are themselves morose, who are feeling that they are undergoing some kind of depression. Such people will only aggravate the problem. Even if you are doing good some problems are bound to be there. In company of positive people, you look at the situation as a part of life. You will not see your problems in the magnifying glass. Thus, it’s best to be in company of happy people. Besides, when you are in the state of sadness, try to find someone to whom you can talk and who generally makes you feel happy. If it is not possible to reach out to them, just talk to them over the phone but come out of your state of sadness.
  1. Use distraction

If there is something that you have been postponing, think of that and start working on the same. Let it a kind of useful distraction. You can even start playing with your pet if you have one. You may read a book that you have been wanting to read. Do anything that will take you away from the current state. But somehow you have to try your best to change. Or just go out and do something, some work of yours which is either pending or which can resolved with some effort.
  1. Shift to a well lighted, lively place

It is been observed that if you tend to stay in a place which is not well lighted you remain sad. If you are sitting in your own room and you find it boring, because you have not brought about any change, its better to find some lively well lighted place. Go there in any which way particularly when you’re not in a happy mood.
  1. Listen to live music

If you’re fond of music then try to pick up some nice happy songs which you have been enjoying in the past. It will renew your happy memories. Music is a wonderful tool for changing your mood and making you at peace with yourself. If at all music does not interest you, which is very unlikely, then you can start working on any of your favorite hobby. Spend some time on it so that you don’t keep on brooding over things which have brought about state of sadness.
Thanks for reading

Negative Emotions

Five types of Negative Emotions which may wreck your Life

First of all, we must understand what are negative emotions. What is the meaning of negative emotion? As human beings we are bound to feel happy or sad with situations or while interacting with people. Impact of such situation or such interaction is emotion. These emotions can be positive or negative. Positive emotions will make us feel happy. Negative emotions on the other side make us feel sad and unhappy. Both these categories of emotions are a part of human life. Both have a role to play. When these are left uncontrolled both these emotions do not help humans. In fact, they tend to add problems in the life which have to be dealt with.
So what should we do?
We must be self-aware and monitor our emotions at all time. What are the examples of negative emotions. Negative emotions are of five types. These are: sadness, anxiety, anger, guilt and shame or embarrassment. Let us examine each of these five types of negative emotions.

Sadness:

This is an emotion which hardly has any positive effect on life. In fact it saps away the time that we lose because of this negative emotion. Except for the fact that we have possibility to contemplate and experience nostalgia, there is no other gain from the emotion of sadness. It reduces energy. It reduces your desire to follow goals. You start feeling that there is no significance of life. If the sadness continues you lose your interest in life.

How to come out of this negative emotion?

The best way is to start doing something interesting. For example if you are fond of painting, start a new picture. If you are fond of singing, start practicing a new song. If you are a health freak, it is time that you start doing some exercise. In short don’t sit and spend away your valuable time in remaining sad.

Anxiety:

Next on the list is Anxiety. Some people may say that anxiety helps you to analyse the situation. It prepares you to meet the challenge ahead. It forces you to do all the preparation that you need to face new situation or a challenge. This is an example of self satisfying assumption. Anxiety will have a negative effect on your brain. Anxiety affects your ability to decide. And it should not be mistaken for need to prepare for meeting any situation. That does not require anxiety. It requires only your decisive thinking and discipline.  Anxiety will only causes stress which will affect your productivity. Whenever you are anxious for a particular challenge which has cropped up in your life the best way is to sit down and write what are the possibilities. You have always to make a choice. If you don’t decide even that will add to your anxiety.

Anger:

The third type of negative emotion is Anger. Anger is the negative emotion which can be used to your advantage. But it will happen only if you are keen to use it. Keen to use Anger to motivate you to do something which you have been postponing. Anger also needs to be in control. When in control you can be sure that it will give you greater energy to face the situation which is difficult and which requires all concentrated effort. However if you think that Anger by itself will help you, if you think that it will solve your problem by itself, you are sadly mistaken. Unbridled anger can cause havoc. It will increase your stress and generate further negative emotions like vengeance or enmity and the like. So, you should be cautious that anger should not be allowed to rule over you. You should only think of using the situation or using this powerful emotion for furthering your course. It definitely enhances your motivation. It definitely increases your willpower to resolve the problem. But as I said earlier you must be in control of your anger. You should not allow anger to have control on you.

Guilt:

Fourth type of negative emotion is guilt. It is generated by your inner self. It happens when you feel that you have done something which you ought not to have done. It is indicative of lack of discipline on your part. It is indicative that you are tempted by small things. It is indicative that you have lesser control on yourself. It is indicative of the weakness of one’s character. How can we use this emotion to our advantage? We should remain self-aware and we should think before doing anything. Over the period you have realized that certain things which you did in the past, left the curse the feeling of guilt. It means that if you are shirking away from your responsibilities, you will have the feeling of guilt. So if you question yourself that you must avoid the negative feeling of guilt which will cause a negative effect on my health, on your thinking, on you brain, you may help yourself to avoid such inaction or even action which you feel will cost you dearly.

Shame or Embarrassment:

Last but not the least we should talk about shame or embarrassment. This negative feeling or emotion demolish our self-confidence. It can reduce our self esteem. This may not be entirely due to your character blemishes. It may be due to environment. Oftentimes there are some incidents where your peers or colleagues or others deliberately try to embarrass you. So what should you do? Whenever you are likely to face such a situation you have to prepare yourself. Maybe you remind one previous occasion when some people misbehaved with you. At that time recall what was your conduct. What was your reaction? How did you deal with the situation? Recall, if you had not handled it properly and that became the cause of embarrassment. You can plan out a different response. In any case if you want to avoid embarrassment which is affecting your personality, you have to do some kind of preparation. In life, if you want to be successful, you have to always prepare for challenging situations. Never be shy of preparation. Never think that you can handle anything and everything because of your ego. Ego has absolutely no place in life except when you mean self-confidence when you’re talking about ego
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How to beat procrastination?

If you want to remove procrastination you must contemplate on the following three aspects of procrastination.
  1. Reasons of procrastination so far as you are concerned.
  2. Decision to remove procrastination from your life.
  3. How to overcome procrastination at all times.
First of all let us talk about the reasons for procrastination. There could be following one or more reasons. These are laziness, indecision and health issues. It is necessary to find out which of these reasons are present in your personality and affecting your work.

If there are health issues, you must consult your doctor. In cases where there are some problems and you feel fatigue most of the time, you can be sure that there are some health problems which need to be resolved. This may time take some time and proper effort and follow-up, but it is necessary that you should undergo the process. There is no shortcut available.

If laziness is the issue you must understand that it is your habit which you have to change. Nobody else will do it for you. Habits die hard and you should be prepared to consistently work to eradicate the bad habit which you may have formed over a period of time.

If however indecision is the problem, you may have to struggle in order to become a decisive person. Here again you will have to dig deep to find out what are the reasons of your ‘indecision’. Mostly this could be related to fear of rejection or fear of failure. In either case the fear tends to become deep-rooted. While one finds it easier to escape this fear by not taking any action, in fact inaction leads to further indecision. Lower self esteem goes down and you find yourself as a poor performer. This is a serious handicap which unfortunately affects 90% of the people, today.
In any case all the above reasons have to be properly identified. These have to be properly addressed. Then only you can go to the next step which is consciously deciding to do away with this bane of life.

How do we do that?

Again, you have to do some research from your own life. You have also to document the problems that you have been facing; losses that this useless habit, procrastination, is causing continuously. It is better to write down all such situations and the damage procrastination has caused in your life in the past. Do it is for as long a period as you can go. Go through the history of the sufferings and of the all losses that you would have suffered. If it is possible you try to convert all the losses into money. Find out the total money lost due to your habit of procrastination. This will open your eyes. It will then be easier to realize that your progress has been suffering because of this bad habit which has been lingering on in your life.
The exercise will surely motivate you to stop procrastination. But don’t ever think that you will be rid of this malady easily. Therefore be prepared to work hard to achieve this feat. The good thing is that consistent efforts in this direction will surely produce results. If you have gone through this exercise honestly and diligently, you will surely decide to ward of this wasteful and costly habit. You will do whatever it takes to achieve this.
Start following your mind, taking actions whatever your inner self suggests. At the same time you have to keep on measuring the result. I have talked to you about two of the three aspects which I mentioned in the beginning and which we must study. Having talked about reasons for procrastination and taking a decision to remove it, eradicate it, we come to the most important aspect of the project. That is how to overcome the procrastination.
I have two critical suggestions which are known to bring forth excellent results. The first one is to start writing a journal. At the end of each day sit down for a few minutes and write down all that happened during the day. Focus on your procrastination. Note down where are you could have acted better. You should also note down if you had postponed anything which needed to be done. For that you should further describe the possible losses which postponing can cause in the coming time. The process of documenting these problems will surely play a very potent role in your enhancing efforts to overcome the serious problem, the one, which has been creating misery in your life.
The second suggestion that I want to give in this regard is:  start reading stories of great achievers. You will find that most of them have achieved what they did because they never suffered from procrastination. In some cases the stories may or may not document how they overcame this serious roadblock if at all they had. Therefore do read. In either case you will be motivated to ward off procrastination in life. Even your basic logic will tell you that it is not worth suffering because of a habit which has never helped anyone. Their life stories will inspire you to follow their examples and do your duties diligently. When you are engaged in performance of your duty, you will find that there is no opportunity to procrastinate.
These are not by any means comprehensive solutions. These are just proven suggestions. You may find some other ways which could be helpful in addition to these. Do everything in your control to fight this enemy of your progress procrastination.
Thanks for reading.
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