8 Ways to become a winner

Chart Out Your Goals carefully and pursue these with precision.

1. Set your goals high so that you always have   something to live for!

In order to win you need to set your goals. You should know what actually you are trying to achieve. But if your goals or not high for which you have to stretch yourself to achieve, your exercise, your efforts me and in futility. So it is necessary for you to carefully design your goals. I don’t say that it should be such which are not realistic, but it should also not be easily reachable because then you will not make sufficient efforts which are required to become a winner.

A goal without a plan is just a wish. So there for which ever goal or goals you have written you must chart out a detailed plan to achieve the same which are required to become a winner.

A goal without a plan is just a wish. So therefore reachable goal or goals you have written you must sort out a detailed plan to achieve. Break large, vague goals down into achievable parts. For example, if your goal is to “win at life,” break that down into smaller goals, such as “get a job I love” “finish my education” “build meaningful relationships” “feel good about myself.


2. How to break a goal into actionable steps?

First, break each goal into smaller ones. Breaking your goals down allows you to track your progress. For instance, the goal “feel good about myself” could be broken down into sub-goals such as “build a positive self-image” “exercise” “be well rested” and “work through negative feelings.”

Break those goals down again into actionable steps. For instance, “be well rested” can be broken down into “1. Start winding down at 8:30.” “2. Be ready for bed by 10 every night.” “3. Wake up at 7:30am and get immediately out of bed.”

Identify the steps that are most difficult. For instance, it may be easy for you to wind down and get into bed at the same time every night, but difficult to pop right out of bed in the morning. 

3. Unless you make the goals time bound, the goals don’t have any significance.

Get organized and create an achievement schedule for yourself. Have daily goals, weekly goals, monthly goals, and yearly goals. Check in regularly to make sure you are achieving them all. If you don’t achieve all your goals one week, try again the next.

4. Check your goals for realism.

Make sure your goals are actually achievable. You can’t win at an impossible game. If a goal can be broken down into actionable steps, it is probably realistic. Make sure your time frame is also realistic. Can everything you want to achieve be achieved in the time you envision? Check your progress as you go, and revise your schedule until the pace of improvement is reasonable.

5. Set yourself up for success with mental strength to visualize it.

Use the wild power of optimism and the cold, shrewd wisdom of pessimism together by practicing mental contrasting. Take a few minutes to imagine yourself winning at your goal. Imagine every detail of perfect success: how it feels, what it looks like, how everyone will react. Then turn it around entirely. Imagine each and every possible roadblock you might come up against.

6. Never compare with others. Compete with yourself.

Compete with yourself as well as with others. When you have achieved a goal, set your next goal higher. For instance, if you got all A’s and B’s one semester, set the goal to get all A’s the semester that follows. Take time to celebrate each goal as you achieve it, but avoid complacency.

7. Turn negative feelings into motivation.

If you notice yourself feeling jealous or unsuccessful, that’s a sign that you’re ready to set a new goal. Identify the cause of the negative feeling, and set a goal that will catapult you beyond it. For instance, if you are jealous of your neighbor’s new car, set goals for earning or saving more money so that you can buy a car you like.

You may end up changing your mind about the car once you have achieved your goal. The satisfaction you get from setting a goal and achieving it will be greater than any satisfaction you can get from showing up someone else.

8. Monitor your actions on daily basis.

It’s necessary to keep track of your work in respect of goals and also the results that are coming through your efforts. When you are having a constant watch you will find that certain times you have ignored some small details which you should not do in your future actions. In this manner if you follow your efforts the results will be much above your expectation. And that is what is required to become a winner.

Thanks for reading.

How to Deal With Difficult People ?

11 critical considerations while approaching a difficult person

1. Choose your battles wisely. 

When butting heads with a difficult person, decide when it is worth your efforts to discuss the problem.[1] Not every fight needs to be fought. The sooner you realize this, the happier your life will become. Ideally, you and this difficult person would be able to set aside your differences and compromise. Sometimes, this is impossible.

2. Pause for a moment.

 Take a deep breath before responding to collect your thoughts and calm your emotions. If your conflict is happening via email or texting, try to avoid sending digital text messages when upset. Take a bit of time to let your stress level decrease. Then you will be able to approach the person more reasonably.

3. State your needs clearly with assertive communication. 

Don’t give the person the opportunity to manipulate you or twist your words. [Aim to use “I” statements rather than “you” accusations. For example:

4. Continue being polite. 

No matter the response of the other person, keep your cool. Do not resort to name-calling. Take breaths before your responses. The key is to not let yourself sink to the other person’s level. Also, the calmer you remain, the more likely the other person will notice and reflect on his or her behavior.

5. Stick to the facts. 

Keep a short clear narrative that is not bogged down with too much detail or emotion. It is very possible you won’t be able to get the person to see your point of view and you don’t need to try to convince them. State what happened and don’t feel you need to explain yourself.

6. Minimize your interactions. 

Although hopefully you can deal with your problem person; if not, limit your time with her. If you must interact, try to keep things short by excusing yourself from the conversation or bringing a third party into the conversation. Stay as positive as possible and make sure to calm down afterwards.

7. Talk to allies. 

If you are not making headway with someone and need to do so, speak with a potential mediator. Perhaps your boss can help improve the situation. If your conflict is within the family, find a mutual party who can negotiate. Strive to share complaints only with people you trust.

8. Realize there will always be difficult people. 

No matter where you live or work, you will encounter people who seem like they are out to hurt others. The key is to learn how to deal with these sorts of people. Because they are impossible to avoid, it may help you to identify some of the different types of difficult people so you can decide on the best way to interact with them. They include:

9. Increase your frustration tolerance.

 The other person’s behavior is beyond your control, but you get to decide how you will react and whether or not to engage them. One way to do this is by increasing your frustration tolerance, which involves challenging irrational beliefs that may lead you to become stressed, angry or lose your cool.

10. Examine your own behavior.

 If people continually attack you, it could be that you are attracting the wrong types of people. For example, if you are overly negative, other pessimistic people might flock to you. Try to find friends who are engaged in positive behaviors.

11. Be aware of your perceptions of others. 

One of your friends might seem difficult, but she could be going through a rough time. Instead of judging others’ behaviors immediately, practice empathy by stepping back and reflecting on how you would feel in his or her place. If you are sensitive to personality differences, you will be better able to hand diverse conflicts.

6 Aspects of PowerPacked Personality

There are 6 critical aspects of personality which every individual needs to analyze and review. One may be extremely efficient in the work, highly qualified, good at application of mind and yet he/she may miss out on some crucial issues that concern life.

  1. Communication Skills: These skills are very important and often undermined and ignored. Speech and written communication are the vehicles of our expression. If we have great thoughts but we cannot express these effectively, the process affects our self confidence. Likewise in the negotiations even though we may be right, have all necessary information, great arguments, yet if our verbal communication skills are in any way lacking; we miss out on opportunities.
  2. Interpersonal Skills: Interpersonal skills refer to our ability to connect with other people. It refers to our competence to influence people around us at the work place or at home for the desired results. Intentions are indeed important. But if our communication does not reflect and establish our intention, the goodness is wasted. Associated with it is your reliability. And also, how you conduct yourself and your behavior.
  3. Leadership Skills: Even if you don’t have a single follower, you still are a leader. You lead yourself. That is extremely important. Like a good leader if you analyze your strengths and weaknesses, if you make best use of time, if you are self aware, and if you take care of mental or physical health, nothing will stop you from leading yourself and others very efficiently. In the present competitive environment the leadership skills have assumed even greater importance.
  4. Assertiveness: Assertiveness is not aggression though it is often confused with aggression. It represents your talent to be able to say ‘no’ when you want to say ‘no’. Often times it seems that because of various considerations and because of fear that we may offend others, even when we don’t want to say ‘yes’ we do so. It puts us to lot of difficulties. At other times we have to face problems with members of our family and friends. How to say ‘no’ without offending the other person is nothing short of an art. It is to be developed. It is to be continuously mastered. This art requires cordiality in your tone, coordination between the mind and the speech and active listening. The proficiency in language is also very important to create proper impression.
  5. Body language, Grooming and Image management: Body language may be considered as a part of your communication skills but it is also a part of your physical personality. Positive body language means that you stand comfortably on your feet. Straight but never stooping even a little or bringing out your chest. Wearing a slight smile on your face with a relaxed look of peace, would add to the physical personality. Grooming is also important. What to wear when to wear indeed makes a difference. Of late quite a bit of emphasis is also put on image management. What is image management? It is the impression which you create on people when you meet them first time. It is said that the 15 seconds make a lasting impact. It may be debatable. However image management has become an important aspect of one’s personality.
  6. Time Management: Last but not the least; you need to be a very efficient manager of your time. This great resource is equally distributed to all of us. Our productivity and growth depends among other things on its use. In order to check where we lose time or do not manage effectively, we must make a ‘Time Log’ for 2 to 3 days. ‘Time Log’ is a list of details of your activities routine, small or big on daily basis. You can identify then where you can save time or be more efficient. Besides, we need to focus on what we do. Prioritizing is also important. Above all, discipline must be maintained which means you do things which need to be done at a particular time even if you don’t like it

I do not claim that the above that 6 aspects comprise the total personality. However these are the main areas which should be reviewed periodically. Life is extremely interesting when we are self aware, when we know ‘what we are’, when we realize our objectives and keep on working to achieve these bit by bit.


Thanks for reading

One day ‘Humour & Public Speaking’ workshop On 23rd November 2019

Rationale:

Humour has much benefit which is profusely passed on to the practitioners of Humour. Humour promotes efficiency. When we start using humour at work place, our job becomes full of fun. Among other things, it helps to remove stress and improve productivity. How to use humour with discretion is a question mark and a big problem. Our workshop will be very helpful in this context. After clarifying the different aspects of the subject participants are made to practice the use of humour in situations which are simulated.

Objectives:

           Help develop ability to use humour confidently

  • Help raise level of consciousness about humour in communication
  • Development of Modulation
  • Control over nervousness/hesitation etc.
  • Refinement in Communication
  • Fluency in speech; and overall clarity in communication.
  • Poise & Confidence in practice

    Course Contents

    Voice & Speech Training
  • Building better breath control
  • Enhancement of capacity of voice.
  • Effectively using Modulation of Voice
  • Developing cordiality in voice.

    Public Speaking Training
  • 2-Minute & 5-Minute presentations
  • Video Recording & Play Back Sessions
  • Preparing a Presentation using Humour – Developing the Structure
  • Keeping the Presentation on Track – focus on important points
  • Including the right content
  • Connecting with the audience
  • Handling Stage Fright

    Understanding Humour and its use in Public Speaking
  • Understand the elements of humorous anecdotes and how to use them in the workplace
  • How to tailor your messaging to a defined target audience
  • How to structure written messages for maximum audience impact, taking into consideration tone, style, point of view
  • How various platforms convey messages differently in a professional setting

Trainer’s Feedback:

  • Personal Feedback on performances
  • Counseling & Guidance on areas of individual improvement

    Articulation in Communication
  • Handling Q & As effectively
  • Avoiding verbosity – Sticking to the issue
  • Ensuring an appropriate tone of voice in speech
  • Focus on Speaking Sentences

    Who need to attend
  • Teachers, Corporate trainers and Students.
  • Public Speakers in any field
  • Marketers and Sales Executives
  • For N.G.O. professionals
  • Anyone who is interested in Public Speaking

How will you benefit?

Surveys tell us that a person with a good sense of humour is able to cope up with the normal daily stress smilingly. Efficiency of the individual is also improved. Negative emotions like anger, envy blame game are replaced by positive thoughts which encourage you to take positive appropriate action. Following benefits are particularly significant:

1.    Humour helps in Communication:

  1. Humour gets people to listen. “Consistent use of appropriate humour makes people want to read and hear what you say.”
  2. Humour increases the likability of the speaker. “An appropriate use of humour will produce a favorable attitude toward the speaker.”

2.    Humour enhances Relationships:

  1. Humour diffuses conflict. “Humour has long been seen as the great equalizer-a means to identify as a key factor in peace-building and international mediation.
  2. Humour builds trust. “Social benefits of humour include group cohesiveness, reduction of status differentials, and diffusion of conflict, team and trust building among diverse groups.
  3. Humour encourages people to work together. “A growing body of research shows that when you share a laugh with someone, you’re mirroring not only one another’s body language, but also the hormonal and neuronal activity, prompting a mutual investment in each other’s well-being.

3.    Humour  helps problem Solving

  1. Humour boosts overall brainpower. “A dose of humour releases the chemical serotonin in your brain, which improves focus, increase objectivity and improves overall brainpower.
  2. Humour improves decision-making. “Positive moods prompt more flexible decision-making and wider search behavior and greater analytic precision.

4.    Humour breeds better Health

  1. Humour reduces stress. “People with a sense of humour report less stress and anxiety than those with a low sense of humour, despite experiencing the same number of problems at work.”
  2. Humour relaxes muscles. “Humour relaxes muscles, decreases blood pressure and improves our immune system.”

5.    Humour helps Leadership

  1. Humour builds credibility. “Humour users are seen as more credible and as more competent.”

     

    All in all Humour helps in making us happier people!

Commercials:

Duration                    : One full day of training 

Timing                     : 9.00 am to 6.00 pm

Fee                            : Rs. 3000/-

With kind regards,

SatishKakri

Nimble Foundation

318, Tulsiani Chambers,

Nariman Point, Mumbai- 400021

blog.nimblefoundation.org

www.nimblefoundation.org

Tel. 022 22810000, 9930527551

Enhancing Personality Skills since 2003

How to improve Personal Productivity?

A day well-spent is a day cherished. We always find some days in our life where we achieve much more; all that has been planned is easily taken care of. At the end of such a day, we actually feel refreshed. There is no sign of the fatigue that bogs us down on days where nothing much has been achieved. So what causes this seemingly strange paradox? The answer lies in our personal productivity. 

Personal productivity is the output an individual can achieve given the time he has and the tasks he is supposed to perform. Personal productivity is very satisfying for the inner consciousness. It is a primary source of self-confidence for an individual and boosts his or her moral and raises the self-esteem. It is the very foundation of success. An individual who is highly productivity on a day-to-day basis achieves a lot at the end of the week, more in a month, much more in a year and so on. 

So why do people suffer from lack of personal productivity and remain busy in unproductive activities that keep a person occupied and waste his time? There are several reasons for this idle state of mind. These can be summarized as follows:

Lack of Focus: Many people do not proceed with any kind of focus or direction. Without any clarity on what is to be achieved; such people waste away their time waiting for things to happen rather than making them possible. 

  • No personal goals: Every individual must have personal goals. These include family goals, financial goals, spiritual goals, career goals etc. People with no goals often find themselves being self-satisfied with little or no achievements at the end of the day. 
  • Too many distractions: Anyone who wishes to achieve good results must give up this habit of ‘multi-tasking’ or trying to do various things simultaneously. Rather he/she must focus on doing one thing at a time quickly and efficiently before more on to the next thing. 
  • Not preparing a To-do list: People who do not actively plan for the work day – preparing an agenda of things to be carried out during the day handicap themselves by relying completely on their memory and working on an ad-hoc
  • Basis. It is always better to have list of things ready before starting work and planning the available time accordingly. 
  • No review: Even the best of plans may not always produce results. What is important is a continuous review of tasks to be achieved. This will enable unfinished tasks of the previous day to be completed on the day. 
  • Staying happy and cheerful: Enthusiasm and confidence go together. People who are generally cheerful energetically move about the days and quite easily accomplish much more than those who remain serious and self-restrained.

In conclusion, whatever we achieve in the long term ultimately is a sum total off all the small actions we take on a day to day basis. In everything we do, we must strive to improve our personal productivity so that we can live fuller, happier, and more accomplished lives.

Thanks for reading.

Eight Steps to Break Your Bad Habits

Everyone is aware that there are some bad habits that he or she must give up. But habits die very hard and in spite of wanting to give up the habits stay. This is disturbing to some people but others start accepting it as a part of life. Still others don’t even think of taking necessary action or don’t even understand or consider that they have some bad habits which they must give up. As much as some people hate to admit it, humans are not perfect. We know what we should do—like exercise, eat well and get plenty of sleep—but don’t always measure up. And sometimes what starts as an occasional oversight, slip-up or coping mechanism becomes a full-fledged bad habit. The good news is that it’s entirely possible to kick your bad habits.

1. Note down clearly which are the bad habits you want to give up.

Thinking that you have “bad habits” isn’t enough: you need to know exactly what behaviors you’d like to change. You must also write down why you want to give up your conduct or habit which has been troubling you. What losses the bad habits have caused in the past? What will happen if you continue with these habits? The more details that you describe; the better. Always remind yourself that habits die hard and therefore every effort that you make is well deserved..

2. Penalise yourself for not conforming to your decision.

Make a bad habit a little more painful and you might ditch it for good. Money is a great motivator, so you can use it to create some kind of difference in terms of money. Every time you find yourself to continue the bad habit which you have decided to give up, you take out some money from your pocket and put it in a box. This money can be given for charity or for any other household needs. But take out the fixed penalty from your pocket. If someone catches you with whom you have shared Your decision to give up these habits even then you have to find yourself your decision to give up these habits even then you have need to charge the penalty. Time they catch you doing that thing you want to stop doing. It works the other way too: Reward yourself for beating your habit every day by doing something which you like.

3. Identify the triggers of your various bad habits                                      

Understand how we make decisions, is the key to conquering all kinds of bad habits, including those related to money. Often, we repeat bad habits without even realize we’re doing them. There are five cues that usually contribute to every bad habit, though, and being aware of them can help us learn what’s behind those behaviors.

4. Habits die hard so deal with these, one at a time

Forming better new habits takes time and effort, but breaking established bad habits may be even harder. So be patient with yourself and instead of making dramatic adjustments, try focusing on one habit and the smallest steps you can take to “trick your inner caveman.” With food and dieting, for example, small changes like reducing one pack of sugar or switch cream in your coffee to low-fat milk can make a big difference in the long run and may inspire additional small but meaningful changes.

5. Don’t allow friends to encourage you to do something which you consider as a bad habit

With the best intentions, we fall into bad habits when our willpower fades. You might even promise only to have two drinks when going out with friends, for example, but forget that promise completely as soon as you step into the bar. Try setting up reminders in your calendar for yourself for your weakest moments.

6. Try to bring some changes in your routine

Over time, if you do the same behaviors in the same place, your surroundings can become a trigger—sometimes too subtle to notice. If you go on smoke breaks in your office’s parking lot, the parking lot itself can become a cue to smoke. Switch up your surrounds in even the smallest way. The 20-Second Rule can help too: Make bad habits take 20 seconds longer to start. For example, move junk food to the back of the pantry to its less accessible, and plant some healthy snacks up front. In this scenario, you’re relying on your laziness to settle for whatever is closest to your mouth.

7. Don’t be harsh with yourself; be patient and kind.

As we’ve already established, changing bad habits doesn’t happen overnight, so try not to get upset or frustrated with you when the process takes time. As Tabby points out, it takes a while for your brain to form new connections and for a new pattern of behavior to kick in. Don’t chastise yourself because it doesn’t happen instantly

8. Don’t under estimate your ability.

Even if we hate a habit we’re doing, like smoking or biting our nails, we tend to continue doing them because they provide us with some sort of satisfaction or psychological reward. Catch yourself thinking any positive thoughts or feelings about your bad habits and interpret these in some positive terms to remind you of the negative aspects. The important thing is to keep in mind your decision and be self-aware.

Thanks for reading.   

9 Steps to Influence your Audience and make your Speech Memorable

1. Understand your audience as well as you can. 

This includes the expected size of the audience, as well as their age, gender, educational background, and socioeconomic status. It’s also important to know their level of knowledge about the topic you’re presenting. Finally, consider how the audience views you and what they will likely expect to gain from your presentation.[1]For example, will you be presenting to people who are relatively new to the topic, or are you speaking at a professional event where people will have some familiarity? You’ll need to adjust your material to fit their needs. You want to avoid talking over people’s heads, but you also want to avoid giving them a lot of information they already know.

Similarly, your presentation will differ depending on how the audience views you. If they see you as an expert on the topic, your speech should convey that knowledge and authority.

2. Select and practice most befitting tone for your speech.

You can think about the tone of your speech as the mood of the speech. It will be determined by the audience, occasion, topic, and purpose of your speech. You’ll also want to consider your personality, as you’ll want to use a tone that’s natural for you.

If your topic is serious in nature, you may use a grave tone. Alternatively, you might choose a humorous tone for a speech delivered at a celebratory dinner.

Generally you can use a conversational tone for any speech, regardless of the topic or size of the audience. Most important is to be authentic!

Keep in mind that you don’t need to use the same tone for your entire speech. For example, your presentation may start out serious but end with a fun, interactive segment. In this case, you’d want to adjust your tone as the presentation progressed.

3. Slow down the pace and use appropriate pauses to enable your audience to understand and assimilate.

 As a public speaker, you should never feel the need to rush through a presentation. Because anxiety tends to make people speak much faster than they normally would, you should be aware of your rate of speech. Make a conscious point of speaking slowly. If your speech is happening at a more manageable rate, it will be easier for you to feel like you’re in control.

Speaking slowly does not mean speaking in a monotone. Just because you’re taking your time doesn’t mean you need to be boring. The best public speakers will keep a steady speaking pace and use that extra time to inject more expression into their act.

4. Use emphasis on the keyword to enhance the clarity of the speech.

Even if you have gone over every word of your speech with a fine-toothed comb, there are going to be lines that are most important to the central idea you’re discussing. In the case of these especially important lines, it’s crucial you bring added attention to them somehow. This can be done by saying them more slowly, more loudly, or repeating the same line twice. Your audience will immediately pick up on this and will take extra care to remember that point.

A good example of this is through the repetition of “I have a dream” in Martin Luther King “I Have a Dream” speech.

5. Use emotions with discretion while delivering the speech.

Although you may feel very anxious going into a speech, it may actually make things easier if you allow yourself the ability to connect emotionally with the topic and express yourself. Raising and lowering your voice to denote certain feelings can do a ton to engage an audience. As a general rule, people like to feel like they’re being spoken to by a red-blooded human being. Acting like a robot may seem like a safe route if you’re nervous about speaking, but you’ll get a lot farther if you’re candid with your audience.

6. Interact with your audience cordially.

Speeches can be memorized with enough time and practice, but a truly gifted orator will use parts of his speech as an opportunity to communicate directly to the audience. If an audience member has a question, it would be a wasted opportunity not to answer it. The audience will be impressed by your willingness to play off the books and interact seemingly spontaneously.

An audience won’t interact with a speaker unless some stakes have already been raised. You have to get an audience interested in what you’re talking about if you want them to respond actively.

Trying to engage the audience yourself is always a risk. You can’t control what an audience member will say, and you’ll need to improvise a response to whatever they say. Worse still, getting no response from an audience will embarrass you as a presenter. Avoid putting the audience on the spot or asking too many questions.

Let the audience know if you’ll have a question and answer session at the end of your speech. Avoid taking questions or comments while you’re talking, as this could derail your message.

7. Express emotions with your facial expressions.

If you’re nervous, your face will freeze up. Words alone only go so far in communication. The best speeches are emotionally hard-hitting, and it’s intensified when the same feelings are being mirrored by the speaker. Whether rehearsed or not, matching facial expressions will lend your speech with a great air of authenticity. Don’t force it, however. While you certainly want to make yourself animated, you don’t want to appear unnatural. You want your expression to match your tone and words.

8. Sticking to the allotted time is critical.

While great speakers will keep their speaking pace relaxed and take cares not to speed up, you should respect the time of your audience. There is no need to have a half-hour speech where all of the same points could be covered in 20 minutes. It’s much easier to revise the speech itself than to try to speed through sections of your speech

9. Offer heartfelt thanks of your audience after the speech.

Even if you’re the one who is performing, your audience members are taking time out of their schedules to hear you speak about your topic. For this, they deserve some gratitude. Telling a crowd how much you appreciate lending their time to you will end your speech on a positive note of warmth.

Thanks for reading.

9 Ways to build healthy relation with Interpersonal Techniques

1. Respect others by listening actively

 Humans are social creatures by nature, even introverts. For this reason, you may need to take opportunities to interact with others if you want to build healthy relationships with others.

2. Enjoy diversity of people

 When we respect diversity, we respect the right of others to be different from ourselves, opening the door to safer, more meaningful and fruitful interactions. Ways to respect diversity are:

Learn about another culture or religion by attention a service at a worship center. Volunteer in your community to help individuals with disabilities or special needs. Travel to other countries and practice local customs when possible and respectful to do so. Watch documentaries that introduce you to different cultures and parts of the world.

3. Trust in the foundation of good relations

Trust is an essential component of a healthy relationship — it is difficult to make a deeper connection if you don’t feel safe with the other person. Demonstrate your trustworthiness by admitting when you are wrong and apologizing sincerely. Being reliable, you need to communicate openly. [6] You should look for people with the same attributes.

 4. Don’t lose an opportunity to meet new people.

The easiest way to meet people, even briefly, is to start a conversation. Research shows that communications, when initiated, actually makes us happier and have a more positive outlook on people generally.

5. Engage people you meet in interesting verbal communications

Never fidget or check your watch but nod when the other person makes a relevant point.

Listening is the first step to building a strong rapport with others. It shows that we value who they are as well as what is being said. Some keys to good listening are:

Maintain eye contact: This doesn’t mean staring, but it does mean focusing your attention on the companion as opposed to your phone or a person across the room.

Maintain appropriate body language: Your body language can help reinforce confidence in your companion. Don’t

6. Master non verbal communications techniques

Think carefully about what your non-verbal cues say to others. Non-verbal communication reinforces and accents what we are thinking and feeling.

In order to appear confident in non-verbal communication, try to speak at a normal rate (not too fast or too slow), make frequent eye-contact (but don’t stare, look away sometimes), avoid shaking your legs or fidgeting, and try to keep an open presentation (e.g. no arm crossing).

7. Resolve conflict in healthy ways

Conflict, even between like-minded people, is inevitable, and when we are frustrated, it can be easy to say things and act in ways that reflect that frustration and not our values. In order to resolve conflict constructively:

Avoid aggressive body language (such as pointing in someone’s face, standing too close, rolling your eyes, etc.) or language.

Ask questions and present views fairly.

Refuse to name call or resort to character attacks.

Always remind the other person that you respect his views and the right to have them.

8. Always be self-aware and learn new ways to build relations

 While you may want to focus on learning how to have healthy relationships with other people, learning about yourself can actually help you achieve this goal. It is important that you take the time to get to know who you are and what makes you tick, your likes and dislikes, and simply how you experience the world so that you can relate to others in a healthy way.[21]

For instance, being aware of things that set you off can keep you from overreacting. Perhaps you felt that your father didn’t listen to you when you tried to talk to him, and now you know that you tend to lose your cool when you someone doesn’t answer your question right away. If you are aware of this tendency, you can stop yourself before you snap at the person, reminding yourself, “I’m getting upset because this reminds me of Dad. Susan may be formulating a response, or she simply may not have heard me. There is no need to overreact.” Then you avoid blowing up at Susan and possibly damaging your relationship with her.

9. Enhance your self esteem through “self-actualization”

The term “self-actualization” originates with humanistic psychologist Abraham Maslow

It describes the process by which we fulfill lower-level needs so that we are then able to fulfill more conceptual needs.[23]. This ideology places strong emphasis on all levels of self-care and embracing ones needs.

Thanks for reading.

Communications Play a Bigger Role in our Life than we Think

We all communicate at the workplace, in the family or in the society. Our success in three situations depend on how adept we are in communication. Let’s examine four possible combinations of speaking & listening. This will enable us to understand what communication can do to our lives and to our organization. 

Possibility 1.

Effective speaking but poor listening. If this is the leader’s characteristics the results could be as under:
It will increase your focus. You may have generated good followers & good soldiers. But the potential leaders will leave. There will be practically no innovation. Stress level will increase.

Possibility 2.

Effective speaking and active listening. That is the perfect combination for the leader. The focus of the leader and of the organization will remain in the forefront. Things will happen fast. Loyalty of employees will increase. Appreciation of mind and ability to enjoy the work will bring in more breakthroughs, more innovations. People will collaborate with each other and also compete with each other. The best will blossom with the leader’s effective speech and active listening. An atmosphere of sustainable leadership will prevail..

Possibility 3.

Poor speaking but active listening. It will amount to lack of focus. Also, waste of time & money. There will be thrust on management by committees. People might get an impression that anything goes.
Meanwhile active listening will also result in the positives. The employees will become more self-expressed. Application of mind by them will increase. There would be greater innovation.

Possibility 4.

Poor speaking and poor listening. It will be nothing but a slow death of the enterprise. The death of textile mills in Mumbai & Ahmadabad can be attributed to this syndrome. Misunderstanding and conflicts will rule. Opportunities will be missed. There would be high rate of attrition. Isolation will result in fragmentation, and finally extinction.
Just perusing the above possibilities would shake our slumber. Importance of communication will then be fully realized. So, I will deal with both aspects  of communications- good speaking and good listening. This will enable us to leverage the great resource to great extent.

A. Effective Speaking:

How we should go about improving our speaking skills and develop habit of active listening .
First of all it is necessary to have strong content. Content is the king. Effective communications take this into account more than any other aspect of management or even life. Content means domain knowledge. You can’t fool people with shallow thoughts. Much less you can impress them. Lot of hard work goes into acquiring knowledge. The biggest problem is seen when you have worthwhile knowledge but you can’t use into your advantage due to lack of effective speech. Your expression remains impaired. People would barely know that you are a storehouse of useful information.
Then what should you do? Become a good speaker. Practice the art and science of speaking clearly, confidently and convincingly.
How do you speak clearly? You must understand that speech in the result of decision to communicate. First thinking clarifies the idea you want to project to the listener or a group of listeners. Then brain sends a signal to the lungs and some breath is released. Breath strikes the vocal cord to produce sound. But the words are created by the speech organs. So in order to speak clearly, think clearly. Cultivate habit of deep breathing. It enables to have sufficient breath to support strength of your voice. This will also enable you to speak longer sentence without breathing in between. The flow of speech will enable ideas to flow smoothly.

B. Active listening:


Communication does not mean only effective speaking. In fact, it is the beginning point. But even more important is active listening. Active listening will bring about the results that you are looking for. You communicate with someone or a group of listeners with an objective. How can you influence others? By listening to them actively or with your speech. How do you find whether you are a good listener or not? I give below a checklist which is self- expletory.
Checklist:

  1. Don’t think of what you are going to say next when another person is speaking. Just focus on understanding and assimilating what he/she has to say.
  2. You must listen with an open mind. Don’t try to relate with your own experience, similar experience. When someone is relating a story in support of his argument, your tendency to evaluate should be given a pause. Never be judgmental, as they say.
  3. When you are listening, try to recreate mentally what the other person is saying objectively.
  4. Try to see things from the speaker’s point of view. Empathize and be compassionate while listening.
  5. Try to uncover the intent of the speaker. All speakers may not be terse. Their verbosity may require a little extra effort on your part to understand the intent. Make this extra effort.
  6. Think what results you can produce through listening rather than speaking. If you want to influence people, you will be amazed to observe how listening comes in handy and helpful.
  7. Listen a minute longer than it is comfortable. That extra minute will give you extra input. In any case, you are having a dialogue for understanding the other’s point of view.
  8. Last but not the least; you must remember that your words of advice will be seen as unwanted noise. Never give an advice unless asked for. If you are not convinced and the solution demands that you must express your views, do that and say we agree to disagree!

Thanks for reading.


‘Humour & Public Speaking’

Rationale:

Humour has much benefit which is profusely passed on to the practitioners of Humour. Humour promotes efficiency. When we start using humour at work place, our job becomes full of fun. Among other things, it helps to remove stress and improve productivity. How to use humour with discretion is a question mark and a big problem. Our workshop will be very helpful in this context. After clarifying the different aspects of the subject participants are made to practice the use of humour in situations which are simulated.

Objectives:

           Help develop ability to use humour confidently

  • Help raise level of consciousness about humour in communication
  • Development of Modulation
  • Control over nervousness/hesitation etc.
  • Refinement in Communication
  • Fluency in speech; and overall clarity in communication.
  • Poise & Confidence in practice

Course Contents

Voice & Speech Training

  • Building better breath control
  • Enhancement of capacity of voice.
  • Effectively using Modulation of Voice
  • Developing cordiality in voice.

Public Speaking Training

  • 2-Minute & 5-Minute presentations
  • Video Recording & Play Back Sessions
  • Preparing a Presentation using Humour – Developing the Structure
  • Keeping the Presentation on Track – focus on important points
  • Including the right content
  • Connecting with the audience
  • Handling Stage Fright

Understanding Humour and its use in Public Speaking

  • Understand the elements of humorous anecdotes and how to use them in the workplace
  • How to tailor your messaging to a defined target audience
  • How to structure written messages for maximum audience impact, taking into consideration tone, style, point of view
  • How various platforms convey messages differently in a professional setting

Trainer’s Feedback:

  • Personal Feedback on performances
  • Counseling & Guidance on areas of individual improvement

Articulation in Communication

  • Handling Q & As effectively
  • Avoiding verbosity – Sticking to the issue
  • Ensuring an appropriate tone of voice in speech
  • Focus on Speaking Sentences

Who need to attend

  • Teachers, Corporate trainers and Students.
  • Public Speakers in any field
  • Marketers and Sales Executives
  • For N.G.O. professionals
  • Anyone who is interested in Public Speaking

How will you benefit?

Surveys tell us that a person with a good sense of humour is able to cope up with the normal daily stress smilingly. Efficiency of the individual is also improved. Negative emotions like anger, envy blame game are replaced by positive thoughts which encourage you to take positive appropriate action. Following benefits are particularly significant:

  1. Humour helps in Communication:
  2. Humour gets people to listen. “Consistent use of appropriate humour makes people want to read and hear what you say.”
  3. Humour increases the likability of the speaker. “An appropriate use of humour will produce a favorable attitude toward the speaker.”
  4. Humour enhances Relationships:
  5. Humour diffuses conflict. “Humour has long been seen as the great equalizer-a means to identify as a key factor in peace-building and international mediation.
  6. Humour builds trust. “Social benefits of humour include group cohesiveness, reduction of status differentials, and diffusion of conflict, team and trust building among diverse groups.
  7. Humour encourages people to work together. “A growing body of research shows that when you share a laugh with someone, you’re mirroring not only one another’s body language, but also the hormonal and neuronal activity, prompting a mutual investment in each other’s well-being.
  8. Humour  helps problem Solving
  9. Humour boosts overall brainpower. “A dose of humour releases the chemical serotonin in your brain, which improves focus, increase objectivity and improves overall brainpower.
  10. Humour improves decision-making. “Positive moods prompt more flexible decision-making and wider search behavior and greater analytic precision.
  11. Humour breeds better Health
  12. Humour reduces stress. “People with a sense of humour report less stress and anxiety than those with a low sense of humour, despite experiencing the same number of problems at work.”
  13. Humour relaxes muscles. “Humour relaxes muscles, decreases blood pressure and improves our immune system.”
  14. Humour helps Leadership
  15. Humour builds credibility. “Humour users are seen as more credible and as more competent.”

All in all Humour helps in making us happier people!