1. Today, I’ll talk to you about the art of appreciation. Develop the art of appreciating others. You might ask- Art of Appreciation! Where is the need?
To this I say, the need was never as important as it is today. The need to build good relations with people who are concerned, who are connected with you, is critical. In the very competitive world, your progress, even your survival needs help of others. The art of appreciation is the sharpest tool that will be very handy in building good relations. So better acquire this art sooner than later.
2. Next question that might confuse you is: what to appreciate? Well, any accomplishment, a victory, big or small, completion of an important project, qualifying an exam are- all occasions where you require to appreciation. More than that, if you have received any help that deserves appreciation. It deserves recognition and saying ‘thank you’. Thank you is also an appreciation. The person concerned will be happy. And, of course, happiness given always returns often manifold.
3. When to appreciate? As soon as you get the good news, the sooner the better. The achiever will admire your speed. Be the first one. If you get the news late don’t think “now it’s too late’. Remember better late than never! Your reward will be warmer reciprocation. More importantly, you come closer, make a greater stronger bond.
4. Where to appreciate? Anywhere you meet your friend first time after the achievement. If it is your colleagues, you may do it in the office. If you want bigger celebration say it, and do it! Share the joy.
5. How to appreciate? Well, there is the rub. Say it with most appropriate words. Never overdo it. And you need not underplay. Identify the achievement; recognize the effort that would have gone in it. And talk about it. And when you get help, it’s your greater duty to thank the person. Say thank you, warmly. Send ‘Thanks’ message. When occasion deserves, Extend an invite. Achievements may also be congratulated with flowers. Keep on fine tuning your art as the fine notes of music, and keep on enjoying the results.
Thanks
5 habits which don’t allow you gain financial freedom
Everyone wants to gain financial freedom- free from worry of providing finance resource when you stop earning. This is particularly so if you are a working professional. Today, we have examples of financial wizards who have grown to riches starting at the bottom of the ladder. But here we talk about much lesser achievement- just to gain financial freedom. So what is holding you back? There are five major reasons. These are:
- Fear
- Cynicism
- Laziness
- Poor habits
- Arrogance
1. Fear: What is fear? Why does it come? What are the problems that it may create? These are a few of many questions one may ask to understand the affliction and its implications. These may differ from person to person. But the ultimate problem the fear causes is the same. Fear doesn’t allow you to grow. In fact, it makes your life miserable.
2. The second in my list is Cynicism. A cynic is always skeptical of things other than mathematics. The doubtful nature of the cynic doesn’t allow to trust anyone. What if is the perennial problem the cynic faces? With negative, jaundiced view, a cynic becomes a pessimist. She/he is unable to see the brighter side of things. They become color blind and cannot differentiate the various colors of human life. They say that there is light at the end of the tunnel. But for the cynic the tunnel becomes endless. In these circumstances who can progress in any field. They hold back and blame everyone around for this failure.
3. The third the list is When you don’t feel like working, when your indolence doesn’t allow you to get out of the bed, you are too lazy to think solution of even a minor problem. You know what is to be done. You know how it is to be done. But your sluggishness holds you back. You tend to procrastinate. It is often observed that if you delay action, the significance of the action is lost. Who lose out? You. And why? Only because of laziness. The remedy is discipline. Discipline beats laziness. Simple definition of discipline is doing something which needs to be done even when you don’t like.
4. Next point on my list of reasons of failure is “Poor habits”. Good habits are hard to cultivate, but poor habits come uninvited. And then, like the undesirable guests, they occupy the most of your mind. What are these poor habits? You don’t live up to the need of the situation; when you remain deficient in any action that you take. You do nothing about your inadequacies. You get to know that your performance is below average, yet you do nothing about it. You accept below par action as enough. These don’t provoke you to do any better in spite of the rebuff of your superiors; lack of respect of your time and that of others is another unpardonable habit.
5. And finally, it is Arrogance. Arrogance is equal to Ego plus Ignorance. When you think you know all, you feel, that to know what you don’t know is not important, therefore, can be ignored. Arrogance doesn’t allow you to listen. God has endowed every human with two ears, but only one mouth. I would say that we should listen twice as much as we speak. But arrogance will not allow you to listen and understand others. Therefore, you don’t allow others to speak. Your high headedness breeds more enemies than friends. And you stand to lose everywhere. The aforesaid five problems need to be addressed by everyone who wants to progress.
Your success depends on the following three activities:
- Your eye on cash flow
- How you manage people
- And, how you manage your time
But the above 5 snares will not allow you to perform anyone of above three activities even satisfactorily, much less effectively.
Thanks for reading.
What makes ‘Public Speaking’ a critical skill today?
Public Speaking has always been a subject of fear. The great speakers were poor speakers at one time. It is a myth that public speaking is a God given talent. The ability has to be developed. One has to work hard. It’s always better to practice under guidance of a competent trainer.
Public speaking is no longer a necessity for only for the political leaders or motivational speakers. The competence in this talent needs to be developed by everyone who wants to progress and who wants to maintain self-esteem. The concept is now extended even to speaking one on one or to a group or to your family members. The underlying qualities required are:
- Articulation: It refers to the clarity in speech. One must be in a position to express clearly whatever is there in mind. Syllables can be pronounced correctly only with the adept use of speech organs.
- Speech Organs We have 5 speech organs. These are- jaw, tongue, teeth, lips and palate. Wherever some of these are not use adequately, clarity is compromised.
- Eye Contact The speaker has to hold the attention of the listener/listeners. This can be achieved by making an eye contact with the audience. You must connect whether you are speaking to one person or to a large audience. Maintaining an eye contact is crucial.
- Coordination Between Mind & Speech Human brain thinks 10 times faster than the speech. Coordination between the mind and speech is of prime importance. Often times the speaker is at a loss to find the right word. While speaking it causes fumbles during the speech. This happens due to inadequate coordination. It can be achieved with practice.
- No Age Bar It is a fallacy that the talent needs to be developed at an early stage. Age is no bar to develop public speaking talent. Here I would like to relate a recent case study.
One of my students (in his late 60s) said that during his life he never could speak to more than 1 person at a time. A diamond merchant by profession, he retired and handed over the business to his sons. With a desire to give back to the society, he started an NGO. Due to his contacts he was able to gather enough funds. His dedication to the cause enabled him to do good work in his village in Gujarat. Whenever a project would be completed he would face the “biggest problem in his life”. Invariably people would ask him to say few words and that was the “biggest problem”.
Because of the aforesaid compulsion, he was motivated to learn public speaking after retiring from business. A strong desire enabled him to practice hard. Subsequently he participated in various seminars and now he is an accomplished public speaker.
Life has changed. It is moving extremely fast. Snail mail has been replaced by email. Enthusiastic business leaders want things to happen ‘yesterday’. Telecom revolution and internet has changed the rules of the game so far as communication is concerned.
To be continued…..
Sin
When spirits are low
Allowing ignorance to swell
Your actions become slow
And the confusions dwell
In your mind and your soul
Symptoms of sin, this are
Immediately, you must dispel.
But to these negative emotions
And the unwanted situations
You fail to react fast
And allow there to last
You get entangled
Like a spiral bangle.
You cannot came out
Of expanding sin’s clout.
Lessons that we learn from history.
Napoleon Bonaparte
In the worst of times, keep your mind cool and composed. After 20 years of ruling France, Napoleon Bonaparte was defeated by the Allied army. He was forced to abdicate on April 6. 1814. He was exiled to Mediterranean island of Elba. Before leaving, he addressed the remaining officers of France. His address given below gives us a strong lesson that whatever be the circumstance we must maintain our composure of mind. That speaks the strength of one’s character. His address is reproduced below.
“Soldiers of my Old Guard: I bid you farewell. For twenty years I have constantly accompanied you on the road to honor and glory. In these latter times, as in the days of our prosperity, you have invariably been models of courage and fidelity. With men such as you our cause could not be lost; but the war would have been interminable; it would have been civil war, and that would have entailed deeper misfortunes on France.
I have sacrificed all of my interests to those of the country.
I go, but you, my friends, will continue to serve France. Her happiness was my only thought. It will still be the object of my wishes. Do not regret my fate; if I have consented to survive, it is to serve your glory. I intend to write the history of the great achievements we have performed together. Adieu, my friends. Would I could press you all to my heart.”
Thanks for reading
Pursuit of happiness should also be pursuit of success
18 questions you may ask yourself in 8 minutes every day. Observe the change in your attitude to life week after week. The questions are:
- Have you written down your goals? And SMART goals?
- Do you keep in mind that striving for excellence and not looking for perfection makes you more successful?
- Do you realize that struggle and obstacles are the first steps of your story of success?
- Do you have a strong desire to succeed?
- Are you a person committed to your values and determined to win?
- Are you able to shoulder responsibility?
- Are you always prepared to do hard work?
- Do you remain composed in difficult time?
- Do you make it a point to learn from past mistakes?
- Do you always avoid resorting to excuses?
- Are you always courteous and polite without being subservient?
- Do you maintain your discipline?
- Do you believe in yourself and say ‘Yes, I can’
- Are you able to work without supervision or reminder from others?
- Are you persistent in your efforts and approach?
- Are you proud of your excellent performance, whenever it happens?
- Do you believe in continuous learning and have a mentor to help?
- Do you realize that for achieving high degree of success, you much stretch in your efforts?
Thanks for reading.
Three Personalities from Indian Culture & Entertainment
1. Bhagwan also known as Bhagwan Dada. He was born on August 1, 1913 in Mumbai. His first successful movie was Albela. it was produced & directed by him. Albela became a hit. Thereafter he was producing his movies and he was also recognized as an entertaining actor. He was particularly known for his special style of dancing.
Bhagwan’s story is the story of Rages to Riches. At one time he had a fleet of 7 cars. He was successful and entertaining actor. He was also a very generous and helpful man.
His important films are Albela 1951, Aasha 1980, Chori Chori 1956, Geet 1970 and many others. He started his career with the film called Mera Badla made in 1943.
But died as a poor man. Many of his colleagues whom he had helped during his hay days shied away during his penury.
2. Birju Maharaj was born on 4th February 1938 in Varanasi. He belongs to Banaras Gharana. His parents Acchan Maharaj and Ammaji Maharaj were also great dancers.
Whenever we think of an Indian dancer who have trained renowned classical dancers and who has also performed throughout his life, that only name that comes to mind is, Birju Maharaj. His performance was appreciated throughout the world besides, he got many awards. These included National award for classical dancer.
Birju Maharaj choreographed some of the song and dance sequences in various films. His most recent contribution is in the film Bajirao Mastani. In this film he choreograph ‘Mohe Rang do’. This has become extremely popular. The song is sung by Shreya Ghoshal and Pandit Birju Maharaj himself. It is composed by the famous director Sanajy Leela Bhansali. Even at the age of 77 Birju Maharaj is still very active.
3. Pandit Bhimsen Joshi, the Indian classical singer in the history of Indian music who has achieved maximum recognition and awards is, Pandit Bhimsen Joshi.
Many of his albums have become extremely popular. These include Abhangwani, Shradhanjali, Bhakti Sangeet and many more. His awards include Bharat Ratna, Padmvibhushan and others. Without doubt, his singing talent and ability have well deserved the recognition. Commonly he most remember by his song ‘mile soor mera tumhara…..’
He was born on February 4th 1922 in Gadag- Betageri in Karnatka. However most of his time, he spent in Pune. He died on January 24, 2011 in Pune. A classical singer of his stature can only been seen once in a century.
Thanks for reading.
Homage on ‘Punyatithi’
Yesterday the 31st January was a Sunday, my holiday. More importantly, it was Punyatithi (Death anniversary) of two very important actors of Indian cinema. They are- Suraiya and K. N. Singh. With apologies for the delay of one day, I pay homage to these two important actors.
Suraiya was born on 15th June 1929 in Gujranwala, Punjab (now in Pakistan). It was her mother who wanted that she should become an actress. In 1937 she got to perform in All India Radio. She was not formally trained in music. So she just got an opportunity to sing.
However it was in 1945 that Suraiya got the first leading lady role the film called ‘Tadbeer’. Thereafter there was no looking back. When Naushad, the famous music director got an opportunity to meet Suraiya and listen to her song, he decided that he will definitely give her opportunity to sing in his films.
Anmol Ghadi was one of the most popular films of Suraiya. She sang her songs and the music was given by the Naushad. Though Naushad gave her many opportunities, it was music director Husanlal Bhagatram for whom Suraiya sang maximum songs.
Mirza Ghalib was an another very important film. One of the very beautiful ladies of her time, Suraiya was also known for living the character she played. I take this opportunity to post some of her very popular photographs in yesteryear’s.
Suraiya died on 31st January 2004 in Krishna Mahal, the flat at Marine Drive in which she had spent most of her life. Suraiya was honored by the Indian post office on May 3, 2013.
K. N. Singh was known as a gentlemen villain. Actually, he was an advocate. His father was also an advocate. K. N. Singh was supposed to take up the profession of his father. But when we leant that as an advocate he has to prove that whatever he says is the truth even if it is not, he found it against his principle. His conscience did not allow him to do so.
K. N. Singh was also an athlete. He could have represented the country in Olympic Games when he was in 20s. But due to circumstances he could not go there. It seems he was destining to become an actor.
He met Prithviraj Kapoor in Calcutta, who in turn introduced him to son Raj Kapoor. So we find k n. singh featuring in many films of Raj Kapoor. First film was Barsaat followed by Awara. His two important films were released in 1958. These are Howrah Bridge and Chalti Ka Naam Gadi.
(Picture from Howrah Bridge)
As a villain he only played the role of boss of an illegal outfit.
Unfortunately in his last years he turned totally blind. He died on 31st January 2000 at the age of 91.
6 language Techniques to Make Your Speech Excel
Public speaking has become extremely important today. While the content is the king, speaker has to be choosy about the language. We find that language used by some of the speakers is so compelling that listeners are highly influenced. I am detailing below 6 language techniques which make the speech highly effective:
1. Using clear spoken language: Spoken language is not the same as written language. Its sentences have to be short. The long sentences may work well in the written essay but in speech short sentences are better. Further, concrete words should be used rather than the abstract ones. Verbosity needs to be avoided, totally. Above all, greater use of restatement is recommended. But the same should not be repetition the words which you have already used.
2. Concrete language: The language when the listener can create images in his mind. e. g. we say “the legs of speaker were shaking and repetitively he was wiping perspiration on his face.” The above statement is far more effective than saying that the speaker was extremely nervous and did not know how to proceed with a speech.
3. Specific words: It’s better to use specific words rather than generic. e. g. when we say a president of a company it is specific but if we just say manager though president is also a manager, but it is not specific. Manager is more specific than saying an administrator. Indeed, the manager is also an administrator.
4. Figures of speech: Use of any figure of speech makes the speech very interesting. There are number of elements which when used with discretion dramatically improves the quality of the speech. Figures of speech are:
i) Metaphor: metaphor is application of a name or description to something to which it is not literary related. For example, one may say, “life a camera. Just focus on what is important and capture the good times. Develop from the negative and if things don’t work take another shot.” Another example would be- so often we become so focused on the finish line that we fail to enjoy the journey. Such metaphors used appropriately are highly appreciated.
ii) Hyperbole: when we exaggerate anything for emphasis that would be known as hyperbole. The following are the examples of hyperbole in views.
- An obvious and purposeful statement of exaggeration used for emphasis, dramatic effect, and to make a clear poem.
- How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
- “We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.”
iii) Personification: The attribution of human character to animals/inanimate objects or abstract notions is known as personification. Examples:
- Time leaps forward
- The starts winked at me
- The Sun smiled on the city as a new day began.
- The piercing look almost broke the glass
5. Art of restatement: The restatement is an extremely effective way of putting across your point. However, it is important that you should not use the same words or the same sentence again and again. Use language which expresses the same idea but in different words. Imagination and application of mind will do the trick.
6. Creating emphasis: The speaker may use contras. Rhetorical questions can be asked to create a dramatic effect on the listeners. Contras are when you talk of totally opposite things together. Likewise rhetorical questions are such, which leave the audience aghast.
One of the most popular speeches of 20th century is ‘I have a dream’ by Martin Luther King. In this speech, he uses all types of figures of speech. In fact only their adept use has made the speech so popular, and so effective.
Ego’s Eight Obstacles
Ego is often confused with self respect or confidence. In fact it shouldn’t be. Ego is the worst enemy of the individual’s success. There are many ways in which ego creates handicaps. I am listing below eight of these, the prominent ones.
1. Thinking objectively: False ego does not allow you to think objectively. In the world today interaction with others at every stage is critical. In case you are not able to think objectively, invariably, you end up in creating unnecessary differences. When the people argue vehemently and take it personally, ego is the hidden culprit.
2. Causes hesitation: A person suffering from ego often hesitates to reach out to people. Our progress depends on how well others support us. Any handicap or inability to collaborate with others and seek their help becomes an obstacle.
3. Makes you judgmental: A person who is dominated by his/her ego considers ‘own’ opinions as the best. It leads to a tendency of passing judgments even on subjects unknown. The worst comes when you passed judgments on others, their personality, appearance or conduct etc.
4. Impairs listening skills: Ego does not allow the person to be a good listener. They start speaking more to impose their presence. As they are judgmental, they are no longer to open others’ say. In, turn it makes them confined to themselves. If you don’t listen to others, it’s not possible to understand them. In such a situation it’s difficult to hold a constructive dialogue.
5. People’s perception about you: Ego sets you to think ‘I don’t care’. You tend to strongly hold on to your own perception about you. This does not enable you to gel well with others. People avoid your company and you become secluded. A secluded person develops a negative attitude.
6. Inappropriate language: language is the only means of our communication with others, of sharing our thoughts, of learning from others’ experiences. But the egoist in his/her effort to dominate forgets the importance of using appropriate language. Others feel upset though, at times, they may not show it. But they brew ill feelings in their mind.
7. Building relationship: The business today requires not only a good proposal but also ability to build relations. In fact, many companies including banks employ relationship managers. Their job is not sales but just to introduce the organization to the prospective clients. Ego will always come in as a big obstacle in building relations. This is true not only in business but also in social and family environment.
8. Affects negotiating skills: A good negotiator prepares him/her well before going to negotiating table. They visualize all possibilities. On one side they prepare their arguments on the other they have to consider the possible arguments of the opposite party. Even if the person prepares very well so far as strategy is concern, ego will not allow having a smooth sailing during negotiations. There can be no successful negotiation in such a case.
