NIMBLE FOUNDATION BLOG - STAY SAFE! — Page 51 of 69

Dealing with difficult people.

Each person is an individual. The way they are, think, act or react are also different. So they are bound to be. Often times we perceive certain people as difficult even though they may not be if we try to understand them closely. In any case there are indeed some difficult people. We have to deal with them, nevertheless. We cannot avoid them in society, family and/or work place.

It is necessary to form a strategy of dealing with difficult people who are important to us. The critical steps are

To specify what we want to achieve.
Which means could be best to achieve the objective.
To understand them (difficult people) dispassionately
To try to get in to their shoes to evaluate the situation from their perspective
What they perceive about you and what could be their objective in your relationship.

Once you have reviewed the above, the next logical step is to reassess the situation. And review your actions. Take time to do it. In meetings, listen to them closely. Make them realize that you are assimilating their concern not because you have to but also because you like to. This will change the way difficult people look at you and your disposition. Your task becomes easier.

Further, during the meeting ask most relevant questions and briefly. It’s necessary to control your modulation during these conversations. You need to make your interaction informal, interesting and earnest. Listen to their response to your questions intently. Assess their response and think through your own response. And then be prepared to meet them again.

Difficult people are not so difficult, after all.
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The Mystic Poet

Kabir was born on 20^th May 1399, so it is believed. Unconfirmed reports suggest that Kabir was born to a Brahmin widow near Kashi known as Varansi today. His mother abandoned him for the fear wrath of society. He was raised by poor family of Muslims. The head of the family was a weaver.

Kabir was always contemplating as a child. Swami Ramananda a well known saint in the area accepted Kabir as his disciple. That shaped Kabir’s religious thoughts. He started composing poems. His couplets known as Dohas were easy to understand and became very popular. The mystic poet, Kabir, was considered as a common mans saint. He wielded a great influence among the people around. Later his legacy was carried forward by his followers. They called their sect as Kabir Pant. The members of the sect are known kabir panthies. The popularity grows and the members spread over north and central India. Today, they are estimated to be 9.6 million living in the various parts of the world. According to 19.1census they were only about 8 and half lacks.

His couplets have been compiled in a number of books. These include Bijak, Sakhi Granth, Kabir Granthavali, Anurag Sagar and others. Most of this couplets reveal his down to earth common sense. His poems resonate praise for saints. Kabir believed in Bhakti which gave simple knowledge. Chanting of complicated mantras according to him did not bring people closer to God. His poems are full of imagery. These are expressed in vernacular Hindi influenced by various dialects including Avdhi, Braj and Bhojpuri. This couplets compiled in various books are very relevant in the society even today.

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Jamsetji Nusserwanji Tata

Jamsetji Nusserwanji Tata was born in 1839 in a family of Parsi Priest in Navsari which was a small village in Gujarat. At the age of 14 years he took up to business. He was so passionate about business that he determined to set up the biggest (at that time) steel plant, the most modern hotel and a world class institute for study of sciences.

He graduated from The Elphinstone College, Mumbai. Even while he was studying he was devoted to his vision of becoming the greatest businessman and industrialist in India. There is no doubt that his determination and his focus in the pursuit of his goals created the Tata Group as we see it today. Taj Mahal Hotel was the first hotel in India to have electricity when it was commissioned in 1903.

His other projects could not be completed during his life time; but were completed by his family members and the executives that he had recruited. It is not an exaggeration that to say he was the first great visionary businessman of this country. Mr. G. D. Birla who formed the Birla Group came much later. J. N. Tata also started a textile mill in Nagpur which is still running as the Empress Mills. The world class educational institution has also progressed and is now known as Tata Institute of Social Sciences (TISS) in Mumbai. This institute imparts world class education in Social Science and attracts students from various countries.

Today, 19^th May happens to be death anniversary of Shri. J. N. Tata. We remember and pay homage to this great Indian.
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Mother’s Day

Tomorrow, Sunday the 10^th May will be celebrated as ‘Mother’s Day’. Undoubtedly, most important creation of universe is ‘The Mother’. Humanity exists because of her presence. More importantly, the love that mother exhibits for her child is the purest form of love. Nature has given to the woman the courage to face upfront the extreme pain that she undergoes while giving birth to a child. Yet it is dream of every woman to become a mother.

In Hindu philosophy, Mother evokes respect & devotion second only to God. Instead mother is no less that the almighty herself while in all kinds of difficulties are part. Mother wishes well for the child. She does not look for her happiness and or long life; she does that for her child.
In Mahabharata, Kunti portrays an exemplary mother. Then unflinching love for the five sons is unique and can be considered as a role model.

Yashoda’s love for lord Krishna is another great example of Mother’s love. Though Krishna was not her real son, but having accepted him as her son, she takes great care of young Krishna & natures bring with all his naughty activities, the relationship of mother and child in this case too brings can’t the selfless love of the mother.

In fact, Mother’s Day is tribute to the entire womanhood. On the lighter I remember art of repeated dialogue of the Hindi Film “Deewar”. Two brothers are arguing about their possession. One of them (played by Amitabh Bachhan) is a rich goon, while the other one is a police inspector (played by Shashi Kapoor). Amitabh Bachhan: Mere pass bangla hai, gaadi hai, aishoaraam ka saara samaan hai, tere paas kya hai?
Shashi Kapoor: Mere pass Maa hai! And the audience is undoubtedly with winner- Shashi Kapoor who holds Mother’s love in high esteem!”

Let’s all celebrate the Mother’s Day by writing tributes to the Mother from all own experiences.
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4 Essential elements of disaster reporting on TV

The recent earthquake in Nepal has case extensive damage in the Himalayan country. Thousands of lives have been lost. Many children have become orphans the damage to the infrastructure is incalculable. In the circumstances India played its role to help Nepal, a nation in peril.

Sadly our television media reached Kathmandu and other places to cover the disaster. I said sadly, because instead of providing information to evoke sympathy that would motivate people to help; our TV jokers engaged themselves in extracting TRPs. Disaster is not to be treated thus. It is inhuman to ask a person who has lost his near ones ‘How do you feel?’. These TV reporters consider themselves as belonging to a special privileged class. Unfortunately they do not even know the basics of reporting.

The 4 essential elements of disaster reporting on TV according to me are as under:

Language and tone of voice must be serious and somber. However we found that these Johnnies were taking pride in their speech. At times they were energetically emphasizing how their channel was the first to display the disaster.
There should be no unnecessary details, no sensational images to hook the audience. It is an accepted norm of disaster reporting not to show details which can evoke uncontrollable emotions. However, TV reporters were taking pride in bringing all the details for the information of the viewers. Evidently it appeared that reporter was engaged in a task most dear to him. And the task was to hook the audience. It was shameful indeed.
No dramatization whatsoever of tragedies. Unfortunately some of the reporters of private channels devoted themselves to dramatizing the disaster. Their voice modulation and facial expressions depicted as though they were shooting a serial. They thought they were performing their job nicely. They disregarded the suffering of people around and their feelings.
Never ask silly questions to people in grief: That is the attitude expected of everyone; more so of the media reporters. However totally disregarding the same – some channel reporters were even interviewing the people in grief. A mother who lost her son was3. No dramatization disaster is shameful indeed.

It appears television in our country has mushroomed very fast and the medium is often a abused rather than used. Our government should direct that only official Doordarshan or All India Radio should cover and provide all necessary information to news agencies and TV channels.

Dadasaheb Phalke- Father of Indian Cinema

Dadasaheb Phalke was born on 30^th April 1870. Initially he was working as a photographer in a small town called ‘Godhra’. He was not very happy. Further, his wife died in an epidemic- pledge. Due to death of his wife he was extremely upset and he left ‘Godhra’.

For sometime he worked for famous painter Raja Ravi Verma. The painter had great influence on Dadasaheb Phalke. His imagination grew. After working with him sometime, he left the job to start his own printing press. He had joined partners to start this printing company. He was a perfectionist. He went to journey to learn the latest technology in printing. When he came back he was able to upgrade the quality of the printing job. However his partners was not very happy with him. The attitude of the partners was more business oriented while he was motivated by his strong imagination. His desire to pursue greater success in the job of printing also came in way of business result. Eventually he resigned from the press.

He had met German Magician, Carl Heartz while in journey. Carl was one of the 40 employees (All magicians) employed by Limier Brothers. He got interested in making film. Debut film Raja Harishchandra in 1913. This film is known as the first full length Indian movie.

He devoted himself towards learning and mastering the art of film making. The lessons he had learned from the great Indian painter Raja Ravi Verma were very helpful in his pursuit of film making. The imaginative scenes he could create where exemplary. These contributed to his great success.

He was pursuing film making with all his might. Financial problems did not allowed him to do what he wanted in the field of cinema. He came to Mumbai and formed a company with five businessman. The company was named ‘Hindustan Films’ but the partnership did not last long. Finally he had to resign. He decided to retire from films in 1920. There after he wrote a play very acclaimed by called ‘Rangbhoomi’.

The Government of India recognized his contribution to the film industry. In the year 1969 the Government instituted the highest film award in his honor it is called “Dadasaheb Phalke Award”.
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Poise

The Dictionary meaning of Poise is composure or self-possession or equilibrium.
Thus a poised person is self-assured and carries himself/herself gracefully and with dignity.
For human beings the difficulty arises due to emotions. If anything is not happening as per the expectation, the individual is likely to react in a way which is often irrational. Poise is difficult to maintain. However, the benefits are immense. A poised person is able to deal with all kinds of people calmly and elegantly.

How to maintain poise? Psychologists after research have come to certain conclusions, which I would like to reproduce below:
The biggest enemy of poise is anger. Everyone would agree that anger is not beneficial to the individual under any circumstances. A person gets angry due to uncomfortable situations due to uncomfortable situations or due to his/her own inadequacies to meet the situations. One may also get angry if someone insults or speaks in a manner which is unworthy. But with practice one can meet all challenges. They can remain cool in all circumstances but this will happen with consistent efforts and self awareness.

You should laugh with others even if joke is on you. Any sarcastic remarks can easily be laugh away. Apply mind to come out with the solution. This will happen if you take things in their straight.
Life is mixture of highs and lows. Good things are followed by challenges just like night falls after day the life does not offer a regular cycle like night and day. But both difficulties and happy moments are a part of everybody’s’ life. We need to be appreciated. Keep your spirit up even when things go wrong.

Ego is another enemy of poise. Unfortunately this malady is wide spread. It is found in most well-to-do people. Realizing that ego does not serve any purpose we should throw it out from our life.
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What is Personality?

Personality comprises understanding self, fixing one’s goals, physical and mental health and various other facets of the person as seen by himself/herself and as seen by others. Indeed, understanding personality is not easy. But it is extremely important. It is important for your success. More importantly it helps you to achieve happiness.

Understanding self
Each one of us must sit down and contemplate about life’s significance. It’s a kind of vision statement which one must clarify to himself/herself. The act of contemplation on significance will always help you to adopt and maintain a proper prospective.

Specifying Your Goals
By and large everyone has wishes. But these are not specific desires. Wishes become desire only when you specify your goals. Wishes do not allowed you to focus and take actions needed for achievements. These wishes often times remain wishes. Further unrealized wishes erode self esteem. It is imperative therefore to write down clearly on your goals. Goals would state the time frame goals should also clarify how you plan to achieve. Its only when you make a practical plan that you can pursue your goals.

Physical and Mental Health
First on the list of your goals should be good health. One can achieve physically good health by taking care of food, exercise and sleep. Human body is made to last for about 100 years. So we need to use all the faculties with discretion. We must not over use, under-use, but strike a good balance and keep on becoming more effective. Mental health is even more important. It refers to your thoughts, your behavior and your attitude towards others. It also refers to your attitude towards life.

Good Communication Skills are Critical
We all communicate right from the time we are able to speak. In fact babies start communicating immediately after birth. As we grow the social considerations keep on shaping our communication skills. Besides the influence of people around, parents, teachers, friends and others we meet also create an impact. We can develop and maintain good communication skills only with regular review of our ability regarding communications.

Application of Mind
Application of mind enables you to analyze any situation. It enables you to review your performance even in challenges. In fact, human sufferings imparts great life’s lessons One should be willing to learn these lessons. Knowledge acquired through reading books, attending training programs and interacting others play an important role. One should never be judgmental. However it’s necessary to apply mind and to form opinions about anything that concerns us. This process helps us to become more decisive to pursue our goals.

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You may like to join our 2 day workshop on PowerPacked Personality. Please go through the details.
Click: http://nimblefoundation.org/Power-packed-personality.html

Courage & Kindness

Yesterday evening we (entire family) went to watch Cinderella. It’s a movie made 50 years ago. Yet we found it fresh and captivating. An oft repeated children fairy tale enthralled everyone, the little children as well as the senior citizens. Cinderella’s inherent kindness with courage to withstand adversity brought for her fortunes.
Kindness indeed is a virtue which however small in action never goes waste. It enhances self-esteem, but more importantly, kindness brings happiness. In our morning walkers’ club, often the subject of how to improve the morals in the society is discussed. Though India is known for its tolerance & kindness, yet today it is felt that citizens show scant respect for others.

Everyone complains about the conduct of our people. Undoubtedly with the uncanny behavior no one has anything to gain but a lot to lose.
Courage is another aspect of personality which helps you to have a positive attitude. Someone wrote, ‘life shrinks or expands in proportion to one’s courage. How true! A person who lacks courage can hardly live life. They just exist, like other living beings. Life comprises a series of events. Some are to our liking. Others are not so good and certain others very disturbing. The Bhagvad Gita teaches us that all such events good or bad have to be borne by each individual. If you have courage, you may face these without fear. But if you lack courage there could be some horrifying experiences even though the events remain the same.

One may belong to any religion, they usually pray before any dire encounter. Prayer has a certain power. In fact courage is not the absence of fear. Human beings when faced with an unexpected untoward situation are bound to face fear. When you decide to embark upon a challenging situation, you are fully aware of the danger involved. You may be struck with fear but you still go ahead. It only means that you have conquered that fear. Courage is not absence of fear. Courage is nothing but conquering the fear.

Great success can be achieved by someone who adds perseverance to courage and kindness. When you do that even the most difficult tasks can be completed with ease. In fact lives of all great men clearly illustrate that they had courage, were aware always kind, and they all persevered.
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Golden Rules to Build Your Confidence

Lack of Confidence
First of fall we need to understand the reason for lack of confidence. Lack of confidence is due to a fear of one kind or another (mostly unfounded). As an American wrote, “my life was full of misfortunes which never happened”.

Of course, one need not be reckless. Yet, harboring fear never helps. We need to think rationally and pen down what makes us afraid and why. This process helps remove some of the fear and begins the path of building confidence.

A famous Management Guru one said that there are four ‘C’s which form the foundation of an individual’s growth and a Company’s progress. These four virtues are – Curiosity, Confidence, Courage and Consistency. The most important of these happen to be Confidence. If absence of confidence the other virtues will simply disappear.
It is said that “they conquer who believe they can”. Self-belief is thus the second important factor in building up confidence. Confidence emerging out of self-belief is necessary for any significant achievement. New opportunities always carry some incidence of chance. For taking any initiative you must be prepared to take calculated risk. In fact not taking any risk is the biggest risk of life.

Further, Confidence enables you to trust yourself. And if you don’t trust yourself, nobody else will. No one will feel secure in placing any responsibility on you. That will be the dead end. There is no further growth.
Lost Opportunities
Often we do not see opportunities because we are not interested. On the face of it, lack of desire acts as a strong handicap in our progress and growth. But, Confidence trains our mind to desire what the situation demands. It makes us alert enough to recognize and seize emerging opportunities. With desire created by confidence we look ahead, strive hard and succeed.

Confidence breeds courage
For taking risk of any kind one needs to have courage. If we have confidence; we will be able to rise up to the demands of the situation. So we must go ahead and take calculated risk. Courage enables us to move ahead! Yet, if there is no confidence it will be very difficult to harness courage.

Smile
Most people lack self-confidence. You can help them! Smile. Your smile will reassure them. You will be doing a great job helping them to gain confidence. This is particularly true when somebody is meeting a new group of people. We must also remember that the more we are helping others to gain confidence, the more we enhance our own self-confidence! We help ourselves too!!!
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